How To Make Her Feel Safe | CP248

This episode is a gentle invitation for dads, partners, and anyone raising or loving a woman or girl to see things through a different lens. What can sometimes look like overreacting is often something much deeper, a nervous system that is highly attuned to safety.

This isn’t about weakness or sensitivity, but about how the brain and body are wired through biology, hormones, and lived experience. From a young age, many women and girls are constantly scanning for cues of connection and safety, and when that feels uncertain, their reactions can seem intense or personal, but they’re not meant to be. They’re signals.

When we begin to understand this, everything shifts. Instead of reacting with frustration, we can respond in ways that create safety and connection. And in that space, walls come down, conversations open up, and relationships soften.

This episode offers a more compassionate way to understand the women and girls in your life, because when she feels safe and understood, she can come closer, and both people feel more seen, heard, and connected.

Jennifer's Takeaways:

• Understanding Women's Nervous Systems (00:00)
• The Built-In Alarm System (01:35)
• Common Miscommunication Scenarios (03:32)
• The Power of Tone and Connection (06:46)
• Repairing and Building Safety (08:25)
• Understanding Different Nervous Systems (10:49)
• Joking and Teasing (12:11)
• Connecting Before Correcting (13:10)

Meet Jennifer Kolari



Jennifer Kolari is the host of the “Connected Parenting” weekly podcast and the co-host of “The Mental Health Comedy” podcast. Kolari is a frequent guest on Nationwide morning shows and podcasts in th US and Canada. Her advice can also be found in many Canadian and US magazines such as; Today’s Parent, Parents Magazine and Canadian Family.

Kolari’s powerful parenting model is based on the neurobiology of love, teaching parents how to use compassion and empathy as powerful medicine to transform challenging behavior and build children’s emotional resilience and emotional shock absorbers.

Jennifer’s wisdom, quick wit and down to earth style help parents navigate modern-day parenting problems, offering real-life examples as well as practical and effective tools and strategies.

Her highly entertaining, inspiring workshops are shared with warmth and humour, making her a crowd-pleasing speaker with schools, medical professionals, corporations and agencies throughout North America, Europe and Asia.

One of the nation’s leading parenting experts, Jennifer Kolari, is a highly sought- after international speaker and the founder of Connected Parenting. A child and family therapist with a busy practice based in San Diego and Toronto, Kolari is also the author of Connected Parenting: How to Raise A Great Kid (Penguin Group USA and Penguin Canada, 2009) and You’re Ruining My Life! (But Not Really): Surviving the Teenage Years with Connected Parenting (Penguin Canada, 2011).