“Don’t Look Down at the Drop, Look Along the Wave” — Dionne McCulloch
Shownotes
What if you gave a little more attention to what you want, and a little less to everything that could go wrong? For writer and editor Dionne McCulloch, a surfing lesson in her late forties offered a thought that reached far beyond the water: “Don’t look down at the drop, look along the wave.”
This week on A Thought I Kept, I’m joined by Dionne for a conversation about fear, creativity and finding yourself again in midlife. As her three children began moving into adulthood, surfing became a place to rediscover confidence, enjoy her own company and learn that she could do difficult things, even when she spent much of the time falling off.
I first met Dionne at a writing workshop in Bath, where the ideas she shared felt as relevant to life as they did to the page. That thread runs through our conversation: what happens when the thing you want feels too important to admit? From the vulnerability of writing a novel to the discomfort of being a beginner, we explore how wanting something can leave us exposed, why difficulty and joy so often come together, and what it means to keep making room for desire as we get older.
We also talk about storytelling, folk horror and imagining a hopeful future; how community action can build belonging; and why Dionne wants to keep creative work and “heart decisions” human in the age of AI.
In our conversation, we explore:
- Starting something new in midlife and rebuilding self-trust.
- Fear of failure, creative vulnerability and facing the blank page.
- Motherhood, identity and asking what you want next.
- Finding hope and connection through community.
- What fictional monsters can reveal about our real fears.
Dionne McCulloch is a writer, book editor, mother and surfer. Her debut novel, RAYNA, comes out from New Ink in 2027, and her folk-horror story Helminth was published by Dead Ink in Beasts of England. She was shortlisted with special commendation for the 4th Estate/Guardian Prize for a short story that became the novel Rayna. She is a freelance book editor of both fiction and narrative non-fiction and a writing coach. She is also the Associate Director of EMBLAZE-Black Writing Matters out of Bath Spa University, where she also sits on the advisory board of Paper Nations. She has been a judge for two international literary awards and is currently a reader for the inaugural Sareeta Domingo Prize. She lives between Bath and an off-grid cabin in North Devon, England, but she is probably in the ocean.
Instagram: @dionne_mcculloch
Also mentioned:
Island of Stangers film
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About Claire Fitzsimmons
Claire is the host of A Thought I Kept, a wellbeing writer, author and the co-founder of If Lost Start Here. As a Certified Coach and Emotions Coach Practitioner, Claire helps people navigate the everyday lost moments and all the feelings, from anxiety to grief, overwhelm to disconnection.
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The music for all episodes from August 10th was made by Leon in the Wilderness.