John Tucker Must Die

We finally discover the secret reason Helen made Valerie wait nine years to cover the very-2006, adapted-from-Shakespeare (?!?) teen revenge comedy John Tucker Must Die -- she has a condition* that makes her call basketball "football," and it's very painful and embarrassing.

*being dumb

And as promised, here the show note where we ask you to email us at [email protected]. We looked up our email address, and we're pretty sure this is it!