Back by Popular Demand: Using Presence as the Antidote to Trauma with Dr. Jacob Ham

Dr. Jacob Ham, licensed clinical psychologist and Director of the Center for Trauma and Resilience at the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai, joins me for a profound conversation about trauma, attachment, presence, and the relational experiences that help us heal.

Together we explore:

• Why trauma is not defined solely by what happened to us, but by how those experiences continue to shape the way we relate to ourselves and others.
• The difference between living from a state of survival and living from a state of presence.
• How trauma can disrupt our natural capacity to move fluidly between connection, protection, openness, and autonomy.
• Why healing does not happen through insight alone, but through relationships that allow us to experience safety, reflection, and connection.
• The concept of reflective functioning and why it is one of the strongest predictors of secure attachment across generations.
• How becoming aware of our internal "chatter" can help us respond with greater compassion toward ourselves and our children.
• Why rupture and repair are a normal and necessary part of healthy relationships.
• How parents can begin breaking intergenerational cycles by cultivating curiosity, awareness, and presence.

This conversation offers a powerful reminder that secure attachment is not built through perfection. It is built through our willingness to stay present, remain open to reflection, and continually return to connection with ourselves and the people we love. Dr. Ham shares a deeply hopeful perspective on how healing happens and how even small moments of awareness can begin to transform the patterns we pass on to the next generation.