The Prancing Pony Podcast
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- 8. Nov. 2026
Über den Podcast
The Prancing Pony Podcast is a weekly show about the Middle-earth legendarium of J.R.R. Tolkien, hosted - for six seasons - by Alan Sisto and Shawn E. Marchese. Now in its eleventh season, Alan is joined by an all-star cast of co-hosts as he explores more of Middle-earth! Alan and all his co-hosts are passionate Tolkien enthusiasts, inviting listeners to enjoy their detailed exploration of Tolkien’s work, with smart but straightforward discussion and a healthy dose of self-effacing humor, pop-culture references, and bad puns. These are the folks you'd want to hang out with at a pub and talk Tolkien with!
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431 – Her Face Says Freedom
Huan knows that the days of the power of the cats are over; Alan and Sara aren’t entirely sure that’s still the case. Join The Man of the West and The Shieldmaiden of Rohan as Beren is freed from the Cat Condo …
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Huan knows that the days of the power of the cats are over; Alan and Sara aren’t entirely sure that’s still the case. Join The Man of the West and The Shieldmaiden of Rohan as Beren is freed from the Cat Condo of Terror and Lúthien’s face says freedom, as we continue our reading in The Tale of Tinúviel in Beren and Lúthien. Tinúviel misses home, Beren loves hanging out with dogs, and Melko ponders a terrible evil. We agree that wearing a giant dead cat is a bad Halloween costume idea, discover Tolkien’s origin story for cats, and wonder if pliers might have been a better choice. Also, always take down the mobs before you take down the boss.
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430 – Tell Me Lies
Huan wants to end the power of cats forever; Alan and Sara would settle for ending the power of internet trolls for a few years. Join The Man of the West and The Shieldmaiden of Rohan as Tevildo’s doorkeeper …
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Huan wants to end the power of cats forever; Alan and Sara would settle for ending the power of internet trolls for a few years. Join The Man of the West and The Shieldmaiden of Rohan as Tevildo’s doorkeeper gets laid off the hard way as we continue reading The Tale of Tinúviel in Beren and Lúthien. Huan’s plan begins to bear furry fruit, Tinúviel spots his man and begins to tell some sweet little lies, and Tevildo finds himself up a tree. We spot even more threes, wonder what Tevildo’s severance package looks like (hint: it probably involves more severing), and decide that Miaulë might just be the best name for a cat - ever. Also, can we please stop talking about tongues and licking??
Make the HoME audiobooks happen by signing the petition here!
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429 – Rhiannon
Tinwelint (Thingol to the rest of you) asks his daughter to “put this folly away from thee”; Sara’s been telling Alan to do the same for years now. Join The Man of the West and The Shieldmaiden of Rohan as …
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Tinwelint (Thingol to the rest of you) asks his daughter to “put this folly away from thee”; Sara’s been telling Alan to do the same for years now. Join The Man of the West and The Shieldmaiden of Rohan as Tinúviel makes good her escape from the mighty Hirilorn like a cat in the dark as we continue our reading of this early tale in Beren and Lúthien. Tinúviel knows better than to promise what she can’t deliver, Dairon gets lost in the woods and finds himself way off course, and the goodest dog ever gets his earliest introduction. We reach a disturbing conclusion, decide Tinúviel has the weirdest gap-year plans ever, and speculate about the blueprints for Tevildo’s giant cat condo. Also, three is a magic number, oh yes it is.
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428 – Go Your Own Way
Beren is so hungry that he picks his way through leftover scraps at an Orc camp; Alan and Sara are somehow no longer hungry at all. Join The Man of the West and The Shieldmaiden of Rohan as we continue our look …
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Beren is so hungry that he picks his way through leftover scraps at an Orc camp; Alan and Sara are somehow no longer hungry at all. Join The Man of the West and The Shieldmaiden of Rohan as we continue our look at The Tale of Tinúviel in Beren and Lúthien. Beren proves he can really think on his feet, Tevildo smells dog, and Dairon proves to be as petty as he was cowardly. We compare Tinwelint and Melko with surprising results, wonder about the torture of the balrogs (though not too much), and discover that flattery will get you… a really crappy job. Also, we’ve invented a new cat food flavor!
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427 – Dreams
Dairon is named among the three most magic players; Alan and Sara aren’t even named among the three most magic podcasters. Join The Man of the West and The Shieldmaiden of Rohan as we begin our long look at the …
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Dairon is named among the three most magic players; Alan and Sara aren’t even named among the three most magic podcasters. Join The Man of the West and The Shieldmaiden of Rohan as we begin our long look at the oldest version of the story of Beren and Lúthien, known as The Tale of Tinúviel. Tinúviel dances better than anyone this side of Valinor, Beren is an Elf from the wrong side of the tracks, and Tinwelint wants his daughter to listen carefully to the sound of her loneliness. We like Tinúviel’s sass, acknowledge that Beren is a hero too, and readily acknowledge that Verlyn Flieger is our hero. Also, why doesn’t she like The Beatles?
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426 – Tiny Dancer
Christopher Tolkien points out the ‘undercurrent of sardonic humor’ in Tolkien’s earliest version of this story; Alan and Sara’s sardonic humor is more like a whirlpool. Join The Man of the West and The …
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Christopher Tolkien points out the ‘undercurrent of sardonic humor’ in Tolkien’s earliest version of this story; Alan and Sara’s sardonic humor is more like a whirlpool. Join The Man of the West and The Shieldmaiden of Rohan as we finish our walk through of Christopher’s introduction to the story of Beren and Lúthien. Christopher tells us that the original story exists only in a mostly-erased pencil manuscript, sets up the frame narrative for The Tale of Tinúviel, and explains what his father meant by ‘Gnome’. We talk about Tolkien as a different kind of war poet, engage in some lovely Fëanor-bashing, and find out precisely what a palimpsest is. Also, that’s a rom-com.
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425 – Questions After Nightfall 36
Join The Man of the West and The Shieldmaiden of Rohan as we join a few of our patrons in the PPP Common Room for our 36th Questions After Nightfall! Sara looks for the familiar bus tires, as we answer …
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Join The Man of the West and The Shieldmaiden of Rohan as we join a few of our patrons in the PPP Common Room for our 36th Questions After Nightfall! Sara looks for the familiar bus tires, as we answer questions about Nienna and the hobbits, Dwarves and their retirement plans, and medieval murder bunnies. Also, we wonder what the winter is like in Gondolin.
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424 – Your Song
Christopher Tolkien believes that the book he was working on was “in no conceivable way publishable”. Alan and Sara sometimes think the same about the podcast. Join The Man of the West and The Shieldmaiden of …
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Christopher Tolkien believes that the book he was working on was “in no conceivable way publishable”. Alan and Sara sometimes think the same about the podcast. Join The Man of the West and The Shieldmaiden of Rohan as we begin Season 11 and our year-long journey through Beren and Lúthien. Christopher wants to avoid turning his father’s literary history into a nonsense, recognizes that The History of Middle-earth might have a deterrent effect, and uses a familiar voice to tell us about Beleriand. We hope you don’t mind that we find ‘simply inexxagerable’ to be a tremendous phrase. We also try not to cry at an emotional letter, and believe that’s not a book - it’s a weapon. Also, a ‘mere maiden’?
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423 – What Do You Want?
It turns out the Stones are more amenable to legitimate users; too bad all we have are Alan and Shawn. Join The Man of the West and The Lord of the Mark as we conclude our reading of the chapter on The …
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It turns out the Stones are more amenable to legitimate users; too bad all we have are Alan and Shawn. Join The Man of the West and The Lord of the Mark as we conclude our reading of the chapter on The Palantíri, as well as our time in Unfinished Tales, as Season 10 of The Prancing Pony Podcast stumbles across the finish line. Denethor trusts in his own strength, the Stones don’t come with owner’s manuals, and shrouding remains a complete mystery. We observe that Tolkien is really committed to the bit, discuss the lore of the Stones (and the Stones), and agree that Sauron is a micromanager. Also, Shawn chats with Alan about the future of the PPP and calls him a nerd.
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422 – Who Are You?
After the Kings, Gondor declined into a Middle Age of fading knowledge and simpler skills. Alan and Shawn find that surprisingly familiar. Join The Man of the West and The Lord of the Mark as we begin our …
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After the Kings, Gondor declined into a Middle Age of fading knowledge and simpler skills. Alan and Shawn find that surprisingly familiar. Join The Man of the West and The Lord of the Mark as we begin our two-episode look at the final chapter of Unfinished Tales on The Palantíri. The Stewards know better than to use the Stones — for awhile, Saruman takes the concept of free agency a bit too far, and Tolkien lets us think through the problem with Gandalf. We lament the absence of Jack Black, agree that Calenardhon’s name change is nobody’s business but the Rohirrim, and come up with a most-disturbing Lionel Richie adaptation. Also, Carnac the Magnificent.
For more on the Middle-earth Online Art Exhibition that Katie spoke about in the intro, please visit: https://sites.google.com/breecrossroadsartexhibitionevent.com/home/home
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421 – Faith Manages
Some people believe that “Gandalf” was the last appearance of Manwë; Alan is convinced Shawn is the last appearance of Oromë. Join The Man of the West and The Lord of the Mark as they conclude their …
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Some people believe that “Gandalf” was the last appearance of Manwë; Alan is convinced Shawn is the last appearance of Oromë. Join The Man of the West and The Lord of the Mark as they conclude their three-episode walk through the chapter on The Istari from Unfinished Tales. The lore of the wizards is given in alliterative verse; the “north” is defined very, very broadly; and where did Gandalf go, really? We find that a Philology Faire can get Shawn in trouble, wonder what Sindarin might be for ‘burning man’, and discover it’s 106 miles to Chicago. Also, silver badger?
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420 – I Have Always Been Here
The Istari were never young and aged only slowly; Alan and Shawn will have to settle for only one of those two. Join The Man of the West and The Lord of the Mark as they continue their three-part study of The …
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The Istari were never young and aged only slowly; Alan and Shawn will have to settle for only one of those two. Join The Man of the West and The Lord of the Mark as they continue their three-part study of The Istari from Unfinished Tales. The Valar hold a council meeting to help make up for ancient errors; Olórin would prefer to say no to the promotion; and Legolas is called out for underachievement. We speculate about the Blues’ street-wizard lifestyle, wonder about second jottings, and think Morrissey would have made a great Black Wizard. Also: send Thufir, not Duncan.
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419 – A Voice In the Wilderness
The wizards went about in simple guise, as it were of Men already old in years. Alan and Shawn have been doing that for years. Join The Man of the West and The Lord of the Mark as they embark on a three-episode …
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The wizards went about in simple guise, as it were of Men already old in years. Alan and Shawn have been doing that for years. Join The Man of the West and The Lord of the Mark as they embark on a three-episode look at the chapter on the Istari in Unfinished Tales. The Valar send five emissaries, two of whom promptly disappear; Radagast gets distracted watching nature documentaries, and Gandalf has nothing to do with Grand-Elf. We engage in some light blasphemy, imagine Saruman and Gandalf in a Highlander-universe, and decide we ought not count on the parakeets of doom. Also, Kermit the Wizard.
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418 – Questions After Nightfall 35
Join The Man of the West as The Lord of the Mark submits his application to return to the PPP as guest host for a six-episode run to wrap up Season 10; Alan welcomes Shawn back by throwing him into the chaos of …
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Join The Man of the West as The Lord of the Mark submits his application to return to the PPP as guest host for a six-episode run to wrap up Season 10; Alan welcomes Shawn back by throwing him into the chaos of a live Q&A for our 35th Questions After Nightfall! We take a deep dive into some important words from On Fairy-Stories 10 years after the first time we tried, answer a hard question about hard times, and talk about the consequences of bad parenting in Arda. Also, we speculate about Ar-Pharazôn the looksmaxxer, decide that Alan does blasphemy really well, and conclude that Tom wins the internet with “Here’s Your Hröa, What’s Your Hurry?”
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417 – I Am a Rock
Aghan brings a watch-stone to Barach’s house; Alan and Don wonder if that violates the HOA rules. Join The Man of the West and The Obscure Lord of the Rings Facts Guy as we conclude our two-episode look at The …
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Aghan brings a watch-stone to Barach’s house; Alan and Don wonder if that violates the HOA rules. Join The Man of the West and The Obscure Lord of the Rings Facts Guy as we conclude our two-episode look at The Drúedain from Unfinished Tales — and Don’s run of episodes on this season of the PPP. Barach needs home protection, Aghan learns a painful truth, and it’s no surprise the Drúedain are a secretive people. We wonder if Sauron considered that he might have to take a share in the hurts of a thing he made, express our admiration for Tolkien’s story-within-a-story, and discover that while a rock feels no pain, Drúedain do. Also, The Tolkien Professor stops by for a visit!
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416 – The Sound of Silence
The Folk of Haleth retained many practices that seemed strange to the Eldar and the other Atani; Alan retains a few strange practices and Don wants nothing to do with them. Join The Man of the West and The …
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The Folk of Haleth retained many practices that seemed strange to the Eldar and the other Atani; Alan retains a few strange practices and Don wants nothing to do with them. Join The Man of the West and The Obscure Lord of the Rings Facts Guy as we begin our two-episode look at the Unfinished Tales chapter on the enigmatic people known as the Drúedain. The Haladin are already unusual, so what’s one more quirk among Edain?; the Drûg might be ‘unlovely’ but they’re incredible trackers; and their orcs decide not to dare disturb the sound of silence. We only wish we had merriment untainted by scorn, admit we might also be unlovely in looks, and speculate about Drúedain in Númenor. Also, maybe the Drúedain don’t like mushrooms after all?
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415 – Saruman’s OPSEC Problem: Unfinished Tales with Dr. Bret Devereaux
Short cuts lead to long delays… or perhaps just slaughter and death. Join The Man of the West and The Obscure Lord of the Rings Facts Guy as we welcome back the always-insightful, often-hilarious Dr. Bret …
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Short cuts lead to long delays… or perhaps just slaughter and death. Join The Man of the West and The Obscure Lord of the Rings Facts Guy as we welcome back the always-insightful, often-hilarious Dr. Bret Devereaux to the Common Room! Our favorite ancient and military historian (the conjunction is important) joins us to answer questions ranging from Númenórean naval power to the practicality, or lack thereof, of steel bows. You’ll learn more about ship-building than you thought you’d ever need to know, find out that donut armies are (sadly) not covered in sprinkles, and hear about centuries-old food that is still edible — alcohol is a good plan. We ask why a navy might take five years to arrive for their “friends”, wonder how Saruman thought he could actually win this thing, and find ourselves educated about riverine transport. Also: “they’re the same flaw”.
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414 – With or Without You
The Elendilmir worn by the Kings of Arnor had not the ancientry nor potency of the original; there’s got to be a joke in there about Alan and Don, right? Join The Man of the West and The Obscure Lord of the …
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The Elendilmir worn by the Kings of Arnor had not the ancientry nor potency of the original; there’s got to be a joke in there about Alan and Don, right? Join The Man of the West and The Obscure Lord of the Rings Facts Guy as we conclude our two-part look at The Disaster of the Gladden Fields from Unfinished Tales. Isildur realizes he can’t live with or without the Ring, Aragorn discovers a piece of ancient Númenórean history, and Saruman is a naughty wizard. We wonder what the Ring makes invisible, decide neither of us will take part in The Isildur Challenge, and wonder if Aragorn can count. Also: will Don write a new TTRPG campaign?
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413 – The Unforgettable Fire
Isildur proclaims his sovereign lordship over all the Dúnedain; Alan knows better than to proclaim lordship over his own podcast. Join The Man of the West as he welcomes back Don Marshall to the Common Room to …
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Isildur proclaims his sovereign lordship over all the Dúnedain; Alan knows better than to proclaim lordship over his own podcast. Join The Man of the West as he welcomes back Don Marshall to the Common Room to begin our two-part look at the chapter The Disaster of the Gladden Fields from Unfinished Tales. Isildur plans a long road trip, the orcs have the high ground, and Elendur tells his dad to walk til you run and don’t look back. We discuss the state of hand-me-downs among families of Númenórean descent, agree that it is dawn — not Don — that is ever the hope of men, and discover we both liked Solo, thank you very much. Also: another book from Don!
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412 – Far Fallen
Saruman has no time for the simples of peasants; Alan and Matt wouldn’t mind if things were simpler. Join The Man of the West and The Nerd of the Rings as we get an in-depth look at Saruman’s continuing …
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Saruman has no time for the simples of peasants; Alan and Matt wouldn’t mind if things were simpler. Join The Man of the West and The Nerd of the Rings as we get an in-depth look at Saruman’s continuing jealousy of Gandalf as we conclude our four-episode study of The Hunt for the Ring from Unfinished Tales. Saruman knows it’s a long day living in Isengard, Gandalf gives reasons why smoking is actually good, and Radagast gets stuck in the middle. We alliterate with Sean Connery, wonder where the non-smoking section is in Rivendell, and decide we clearly cannot choose the hobbit in front of you. Also, the Nazgûl’s wet socks.
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411 – Saruman Won’t Back Down
Gollum was peculiarly fitted to survive in Moria, though at cost of great misery; Matt is also able to survive his time on the PPP with the same cost. Join The Man of the West and The Nerd of the Rings as we …
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Gollum was peculiarly fitted to survive in Moria, though at cost of great misery; Matt is also able to survive his time on the PPP with the same cost. Join The Man of the West and The Nerd of the Rings as we get a closer look at Saruman’s unenviable position in our third episode of four on The Hunt for the Ring from Unfinished Tales. Gollum doesn’t know how to open a door, Saruman discovers there ain’t no easy way out, and the Nazgûl make a new friend on the road north. We conclude that Númenor messed up Middle-earth timezones but agree they’re still smart enough not to bother with Daylight Saving Time, agree with Bret Devereaux’s conclusion that “Saruman is a dummy-wummy whose plans fail because they are bad”, and observe that we might be the only two people in the Venn diagram of sports fans and Tolkien fans. Also: Matt gets the munchies.
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410 – You Got Lucky, Gollum
Christopher Tolkien tells us that the manuscripts for this story are “in great, though hardly exceptional, confusion” — so it seems this podcast is in good company. Join The Man of the West and The Nerd of the …
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Christopher Tolkien tells us that the manuscripts for this story are “in great, though hardly exceptional, confusion” — so it seems this podcast is in good company. Join The Man of the West and The Nerd of the Rings as we begin to sort through the various versions of the story of The Hunt for the Ring as our four-part look at the chapter continues. The Nazgûl, it seems, have an unexpected weakness; Sauron decides speed is more important than secrecy, but it’s already late in the game; and Gollum successfully hides in Moria after a failed jailbreak-slash-murder attempt. We talk about shooting nerds in a barrel, speculate about Sauron’s pro-con list, and examine the couch cushions of the Anduin. Also, you got lucky, babe, when you found us.
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409 – Runnin’ Down a Ring
Saruon had never paid heed to the halflings, even if he had heard of them — and Matt still doesn’t pay heed to Alan, even if he works with him. Join The Man of the West and The Nerd of the Rings as we begin our …
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Saruon had never paid heed to the halflings, even if he had heard of them — and Matt still doesn’t pay heed to Alan, even if he works with him. Join The Man of the West and The Nerd of the Rings as we begin our four-part dive into the chapter The Hunt for the Ring from Unfinished Tales. Sauron hesitates to unleash his most powerful servants; the Witch-king is workin’ on a mystery, goin’ wherever it leads; and Saruman felt so good, like anything was possible — he’s just wrong. We decide that we won’t walk 900 miles with a Gollum in our bag, imagine that Sauron has short little T-Rex arms, and wonder if traveling naked is really the best idea. Also, an idea for a new carnival snack.
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408 – Questions After Nightfall 34
Join The Man of the West as he welcomes The Nerd of the Rings for his run of episodes this season by throwing him into the deep end of a Live Q&A in the PPP Common Room for our 34th Questions After Nightfall! …
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Join The Man of the West as he welcomes The Nerd of the Rings for his run of episodes this season by throwing him into the deep end of a Live Q&A in the PPP Common Room for our 34th Questions After Nightfall! Matt and Alan decide to crash several legendarium weddings, but we skip Túrin’s: we know too much. We answer an interesting question about what the Tolkien fandom will look like in 500 years, decide to film a documentary in Rivendell, and argue whether being voted your school’s “safest driver” is an insult.
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407 – River of Dreams
Treebeard and the unnamed King of Lórien set bounds between them; Alan and James clearly know no bounds. Join The Man of the West and The Sage of the South as we conclude our six-episode look at The History of …
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Treebeard and the unnamed King of Lórien set bounds between them; Alan and James clearly know no bounds. Join The Man of the West and The Sage of the South as we conclude our six-episode look at The History of Galadriel and Celeborn in Unfinished Tales. Fangorn will walk where he wants to; of the Gwathló, we learn that the river is wide and it’s too hard to cross (especially in the middle of the night); Celeborn is (we guess) surprised to find the meaning of his name has been changed. We imagine Treebeard on the local HOA board, ask what Tolkien meant by Númenórean power arriving “in time”, and observe a real missed opportunity by Amazon for product placement. Also: the given names of Elves, and… George Foreman?
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406 – The Longest Time
Of the Elessar two things are said, though which is true only those Wise could say who now are gone — to paraphrase Merry, “that leaves us out, James”. Join The Man of the West and The Sage of the South as we …
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Of the Elessar two things are said, though which is true only those Wise could say who now are gone — to paraphrase Merry, “that leaves us out, James”. Join The Man of the West and The Sage of the South as we return from our short break from The History of Galadriel and Celeborn to study a green gem and learn more about the Silvan Elves. Enerdhil becomes Sir-Not-Appearing-In-This-Book, Gandalf plays the part of a carnival magician, and Galadriel relishes being a big fish in a small pond. We wonder if “brooch” hid under the couch during the Great Vowel Shift, agree that good fences make good neighbors, and discover that Celebrimbor has been a fool for lesser things. Also: good neighbors don’t make good fences.
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405 – Tolkien Reading Day 2026
Join us all in the Common Room for the Prancing Pony Podcast’s 11th annual Tolkien Reading Day special. Tolkien Reading Day is observed every March 25 in honor of the destruction of the Ring and the downfall of …
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Join us all in the Common Room for the Prancing Pony Podcast’s 11th annual Tolkien Reading Day special. Tolkien Reading Day is observed every March 25 in honor of the destruction of the Ring and the downfall of Barad-dûr. This year’s theme, as chosen by the Tolkien Society, is Unlikely Heroes — which describes each of the co-hosts who’ve joined with The Man of the West to present readings that showcase this year’s theme. Matt calls ‘dibs’, Don’s hero is a bird, Sara surprisingly doesn’t choose Aldarion, Shawn finds two heroes to thwack the Fëanor-shaped piñata, while James and Alan really aren’t crying at all, at all.
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404 – Uptown Girl
Lórien had long years of peace and obscurity under the rule of Amdír; the PPP has had 10 years of, well, obscurity under the rule of Alan. Join The Man of the West and the Sage of the South as we continue our …
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Lórien had long years of peace and obscurity under the rule of Amdír; the PPP has had 10 years of, well, obscurity under the rule of Alan. Join The Man of the West and the Sage of the South as we continue our deep dive into the story of Amroth and Nimrodel found in The History of Galadriel and Celeborn. Galadriel sees just how much those poor Silvan Elves need proper leadership; Amroth’s name, it turns out, might have come from living in a treehouse; and Imrazôr wonders what Mithrellas will do when she wakes up and makes up her mind. We encounter the Rick Steves of Middle-earth, determine that it’s always leg day in Minas Tirith, and discover that Alan cannot claim descent from the Kings. Also: Rhovanion on $10 a day.
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403 – Only the Good Die Young
When Sauron learned of Celebrimbor’s revolt, his wrath was revealed; Alan doesn’t wait for James to revolt, but his wrath is reduced to nothing more than bad jokes. Join The Man of the West and The Sage of the …
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When Sauron learned of Celebrimbor’s revolt, his wrath was revealed; Alan doesn’t wait for James to revolt, but his wrath is reduced to nothing more than bad jokes. Join The Man of the West and The Sage of the South as Sauron has his way in Eregion in our third episode on The History of Galadriel and Celeborn. Celebrimbor runs with a dangerous crowd, the Númenóreans show up five years late, and Amroth tragically discovers that Elves can’t swim across an ocean. We remind you how helpful it is to read Tolkien aloud, agree that Círdan would never lie, and recognize that the taste for power marks the beginning of the Downfall. Also, Rings of Power catches a few strays.
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402 – All About Soul
Christopher Tolkien says his father’s writing on Galadriel and Celeborn is “very roughly composed”; some way that our episodes are even more roughly composed. Join The Man of the West and The Sage of the South …
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Christopher Tolkien says his father’s writing on Galadriel and Celeborn is “very roughly composed”; some way that our episodes are even more roughly composed. Join The Man of the West and The Sage of the South as we continue our futile quest for a consistent storyline in The History of Galadriel and Celeborn. Amroth is and is not their son, Galadriel rolls a natural 20 for ‘Detect Evil’, and Celeborn wonders ‘why does she stay?’ We ask how to clean up the residue of evil, discover Sauron is a NIMBY, and ask who is Celebrimbor really. Also: why did it have to be guinea pigs?
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