S5:E36 - Kate & Oliver

Kate was 39, grieving her dad, and finally certain. She’d spent three years in a COVID relationship, lost her father to cancer, watched her partner lose his dad, and felt the whole thing quietly unravel. When it did, the clarity was instant: she rang Melbourne IVF two months before her 40th birthday.

What followed was ICSI, 13 eggs retrieved, a failed first transfer, a natural frozen cycle that worked — and then the worst hyperemesis gravidarum her obstetrician had ever seen. Kate was on 13 tablets a day, had IV fluids at home, missed most of a school term, and spent the first trimester in what she describes honestly as anxiety and depression. Her baby was perfectly healthy. She wasn’t, and she talks about it without filters.

She also talks about the C-section she loved (favourite song, saw the placenta, best part of the whole process), the Airbnb-for-mum postpartum hack, the triple feeding she stopped at three months, and Oliver Ian — 11 months old, named for her nan Olive and her dad Ian.

Trigger warnings: Hyperemesis gravidarum; mental health impact during pregnancy (anxiety, depression); pregnancy movement scare (resolved).

In this episode:

• Grief as the catalyst that made everything clear
• Choosing Melbourne IVF and Dr Kate Stern
• ICSI at 40 — why Kate went straight there
• The pre-op cubicle moment (feeling dad and nan)
• 13 eggs, failed first transfer, natural frozen cycle
• Hyperemesis gravidarum — the honest account
• Elective C-section at Francis Perry Hospital
• The Airbnb-for-mum postpartum solution
• Triple feeding, formula feeding, and enormous relief
• Oliver Ian: three generations in a name
• Frozen embryos — the home freezer decision
• Why Kate decided one child is exactly right for her life

This episode is brought to you by City Fertility

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Still considering whether this path is right for you?

The Considering Solo Motherhood course helps you make an informed, empowered decision — and understand what the process actually looks like before you start. Live or on demand, from anywhere in the world. Learn more here.