The Wise Wife Podcast
- Episódios
- 47
- Publicação
- quinzenal
- Último episódio
- 28 out 2026
Sobre o podcast
The Wise Wife Podcast is for women who are standing for their marriage and refusing to surrender God’s design to passivity, fear, or cultural advice. Hosted by Christian author and mentor Natasha Drisdelle, each episode brings biblical clarity, spiritual discipline, and practical instruction for women who are fighting the right fight — even when their marriage appears broken, distant, or beyond repair. This is not a podcast about controlling outcomes or fixing your husband. It’s about learning how to stand rightly before God, exercise spiritual authority, and partner with Jesus in the work of restoration. Through Scripture-based teaching, real-life application, and hard-won wisdom, Natasha teaches women how to stop striving in their own strength and begin fighting with God. It takes two to save a marriage: you and Jesus.
Episódios 47
E45 Are You Letting God Write Your Story?
You say you've given your marriage to God, but are you still telling Him how the story has to go? Many of us have one thing we have decided cannot happen in our marriage. It might be papers showing up, or …
Notas do episódio
You say you've given your marriage to God, but are you still telling Him how the story has to go?
Many of us have one thing we have decided cannot happen in our marriage. It might be papers showing up, or another woman getting involved. We keep hoping as long as that line holds, and we quietly decide that if it is crossed, our hope goes with it.
In this episode I talk about what that line does to us. When a circumstance gets that much authority, fear starts setting the terms, and we spend our days managing outcomes we were never given the ability to control.
We look at John 11. Jesus loved Mary, Martha and Lazarus, and He still stayed where He was for two more days. They were watching for Him to prevent a death. They were about to see Him raise the dead.
I also share what happened on the day my husband moved out, a date I never marked on my calendar, and why the enemy does not get a yearly reservation on any day God has made.
Releasing the outcome does not make you passive. I talk about reading the paperwork, getting wise counsel and drawing boundaries while you keep praying for restoration. You can describe your circumstances honestly without adding a conclusion God has not given you.
And if you are being threatened or harmed, giving God the pen does not mean staying where you are unsafe. Getting safe comes first.
Scripture referenced in this episode- Isaiah 26:3
- Psalm 118:24
- John 11 (including John 11:14)
- Romans 8:28
- Describing what has happened is different from declaring what it means. "My husband has filed for divorce" may be a fact. "My life is over" is a conclusion. Stay with the facts and leave the conclusion with God.
- You are responsible for your obedience. You cannot manufacture his. Your husband's choices are not a report card on your spiritual performance.
- Giving God the pen means releasing the timetable. You can pray for restoration and prepare wisely while you keep your boundaries, without demanding that the next scene happen on your schedule.
- Join the Wise Wife community: https://www.wisewife.co/community-sp
- Get The Wise Wife Letters: https://www.wisewife.co/newsletters/the-wise-wife-letters/
- Everything else is at https://www.wisewife.co
- If the idea of living in strength and dignity is new to you, listen to Episode 38, How to Laugh at the Days to Come.
If this episode helped you, follow the show wherever you listen and leave a review so other wives can find it. If you know a woman who is exhausted from holding everything in her marriage together, send it to her.
E44 You Keep Rebuking the Demons, But Are You Feeding Them?
You're praying, "Satan, get behind me." Then you spend the next six hours checking your husband’s location, rehearsing everything he said, arguing with him in your head, stalking the other woman online, and …
Notas do episódio
You're praying, "Satan, get behind me." Then you spend the next six hours checking your husband’s location, rehearsing everything he said, arguing with him in your head, stalking the other woman online, and calling five friends to tell the story one more time.
You're trying to cast something out that you keep setting a place for.
Ephesians 4:26-27 calls it giving the devil a foothold: place, room, opportunity, territory. Most of us never worship Satan outright. We hand him territory one small surrender at a time: unforgiveness, bitterness, fear, retaliation, gossip, manipulation, shame, accusation. None of it feels demonic while you're doing it. It feels justified.
I walk through 7 signs that you're feeding the demons instead of starving them, and what it actually costs you to keep doing it.
Submission comes before resistance. James 4:7 doesn't say resist the devil and he'll flee. It says submit to God first. The greatest act of spiritual warfare isn't a louder prayer. It's surrender, and yes, even marriage restoration can become a desire of your flesh that you're praying from instead of praying through.
I also draw the line between speaking truth and accusation, because the two get confused constantly in Christian marriage circles. Speaking truth identifies behavior. Accusation defines someone's identity. One partners with God. The other partners with the accuser of the brethren.
By the end of this episode you'll know exactly which patterns are feeding your strongholds, and the 3 steps for starving them instead: repent, renounce, and fill the house with truth instead of leaving it empty.
Scripture referenced in this episode
Ephesians 4:26-27, James 4:7, 1 Peter 5:8, 1 Peter 2:11, Titus 1:15, 2 Corinthians 2:11, Matthew 26:41, Luke 22:31, Revelation 12:10, Romans 12:2, Philippians 4:8, Proverbs 26:20, Luke 11:24-26
Three key takeaways
- A foothold is not full surrender, but it becomes one. Unforgiveness, fear, retaliation, gossip, manipulation, shame, and accusation each hand the enemy a little more territory. None of them feel demonic while you're doing them. That's the danger.
- Submission comes before resistance. The greatest act of spiritual warfare is not a louder or more specific rebuke. It's surrendering your plans, your timeline, and your outcome to God first. Spiritual warfare language can still be witchcraft if you're only using it to pray for what your flesh wants.
- Speaking truth identifies behavior. Accusation defines identity. You can call a pattern sinful and destructive without telling someone who they are forever. One is discernment. The other is partnering with the accuser.
Continue with Wise Wife Co
Join the Wise Wife Co Community for weekly group coaching and teaching: https://www.wisewife.co/community-sp
Get The Wise Wife Letters in your inbox: https://www.wisewife.co/newsletters/the-wise-wife-letters/Subscribe and review
If this episode named something you've been feeding without realizing it, hit subscribe wherever you listen, and leave a review. It's how the next wife finds this show before she spends another year feeding the wrong thing.E43 What No One Tells You About Marriage Restoration
Most women standing for their marriage treat restoration like the finish line. He comes home, the affair ends, he finally chooses the marriage, and after all the praying and fasting and waiting you think, "We …
Notas do episódio
Most women standing for their marriage treat restoration like the finish line. He comes home, the affair ends, he finally chooses the marriage, and after all the praying and fasting and waiting you think, "We made it. Now everything will be good." Here is what I wish I had understood sooner. Restoration does not hand you the marriage of your dreams. It hands you a do-over, a second chance to build the marriage you should have had the first time. I pray God restores you before He restores your marriage, and in this episode I explain why. I share what the year of my own separation taught me, why the hardest season of my marriage came after Tim came home, and why you do not actually want your old marriage back. I walk through the patterns I see break marriages again and again, and I show you what strength and dignity looks like in the ordinary, daily moments where real change is won or lost. If you are standing today, this episode will help you stop asking only "when is he coming home" and start asking "who do I need to become." And if what you are facing is not just hard but harmful, I am clear about that too: your safety comes first. In this episode Why restoration is a starting line, not a finish line, and how that one shift changes how you stand What I said to my husband that stopped me from begging him back into the marriage we used to have The Apostle Paul problem: a dramatic encounter with God is real, but sanctification still takes years Patterns that quietly break marriages: personality differences, toxic extended family and the proxy narcissist, the golden child, and addiction or escapism How to stop getting in the pig pen, climbing back on the merry-go-round, and acting as his parole officer What Proverbs 31:25 strength and dignity actually looks like day to day Where safety has to come before any marriage strategy Three takeaways Restoration is the mercy of God saying, "Let's build something different." Don't aim to get your old marriage back. Aim to become the woman who can help build a new one. Most transformation is not sudden. It is one conversation handled better, one boundary held, one moment you pray instead of panic, and then another, until you look up years later and realize you are not who you used to be. You can tell the truth and extend grace at the same time. But if there is abuse, coercion, or danger, strength and dignity means distance and outside help, not endurance. A note on safety This episode deals with the difference between a hard marriage and a harmful one. If you are facing abuse, threats, or danger, please get to safety and get help first. Honoring God and removing yourself from danger are not opposites.
E42 Is Your Marriage Harmful... or Just Hard? Part 2
You will learn more about your marriage from what happens after you set one boundary than from anything he says when things are calm. In a hard marriage, a boundary frustrates him. In a harmful marriage, a …
Notas do episódio
You will learn more about your marriage from what happens after you set one boundary than from anything he says when things are calm. In a hard marriage, a boundary frustrates him. In a harmful marriage, a boundary triggers retaliation. In part 2 I walk through how a husband responds to boundaries and consequences, what genuine repentance looks like next to regret, and 5 questions that will show you where you actually are. Then I name the red flags where the confusion needs to end, and I close in a prayer of deliverance. Start with Part 1 if you have not heard it yet. If you are being harmed or threatened, your safety comes first. You can honor God and still remove yourself from danger. In immediate danger, call 911. In the US, the National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799-7233. Come join us inside the Wise Wife Community: https://www.wisewife.co/community-sp
E41 Is Your Marriage Harmful... or Just Hard?
Hard marriages contain problems. Harmful marriages contain patterns of power. Most Christian women have never been taught how to tell which one they are living in. You have been taught forgiveness. You have …
Notas do episódio
Hard marriages contain problems. Harmful marriages contain patterns of power. Most Christian women have never been taught how to tell which one they are living in. You have been taught forgiveness. You have been taught submission, covenant, and faithfulness. I stand on every one of those. But I have watched women take that teaching and use it to explain away something that was never hers to carry. I have also watched women walk away when what God was actually asking of them was growth. In this episode I walk you through 15 side-by-side comparisons from nearly 2 decades of this work: conflict against intimidation, poor communication against twisted communication, money as a stressor against money as a weapon, defensiveness against punished confrontation, poor leadership against weaponized headship. This is part 1 of 2. Part 2 is available right now. If you are being harmed or threatened, your safety comes first. You can honor God and still remove yourself from danger. Come join us inside the Wise Wife Community: https://www.wisewife.co/community-sp
E40 The 7 R's of Restoration
You can pray for restoration every morning and still not be ready for it. After almost 20 years of standing with women who are believing God for their marriages, I keep seeing the same 7 things in the wife …
Notas do episódio
You can pray for restoration every morning and still not be ready for it.
After almost 20 years of standing with women who are believing God for their marriages, I keep seeing the same 7 things in the wife before her breakthrough ever comes. Not in the prodigal. In her. This is not a formula, and I am not promising that checking 7 boxes brings your husband home by Christmas. But in every restoration I have watched actually hold, these 7 were already at work in the standing wife. God is not restoring just a marriage. He is restoring people, and He seems to start with the one who is listening.
E39 The Single Strategy that Saved My Marriage
You've been praying, you've been showing up, you've been doing what everyone told you was the right thing. And your marriage is still getting worse. There are 2 types of prodigal spirits that drive relationship …
Notas do episódio
You've been praying, you've been showing up, you've been doing what everyone told you was the right thing. And your marriage is still getting worse.
There are 2 types of prodigal spirits that drive relationship breakdown: rejection and dominance. They attract their opposite, and they feed off each other. When the marriage starts to strain, a wife naturally reaches for the strategy that would work on her own spirit. Grace poured on a dominant husband feeds his control. Pressure applied to a rejection-driven husband pushes him deeper into hiding. That is why you can give everything you have and still watch things get worse.
In this episode, I walk you through both spirits: how each one thinks, how it behaves in a marriage, and how to discern which one is driving your husband's behavior (and which one is at work in you). I share the story of a wife whose 20 years of peacekeeping fed her husband's coercive control, and my own story as a former dominant spirit whose breakthrough started when finally faced with consequences. We go to Adam and Eve, Ahab and Jezebel, and 1 Peter 3:1-2 to see what pure and reverent behavior actually requires.
Resources mentioned:
- Two Types of Prodigals (course). Currently includes 30 days of access to the course support circle, live Q&A group coaching with Natasha. https://www.wisewife.co/course-two-types-prodigals
- The Wise Wife Blueprint (book), where Natasha tells her full story. wisewifeblueprint.com
Follow the show for a new episode every Wednesday. It helps me keep putting this teaching out.
E38 How to Laugh at the Days to Come When Your Life is Falling Apart
Proverbs 31:25 says a woman clothed in strength and dignity can laugh at the days to come. Most of us can't laugh, because tomorrow scares us and we're holding our version of how things should go with both …
Notas do episódio
Proverbs 31:25 says a woman clothed in strength and dignity can laugh at the days to come. Most of us can't laugh, because tomorrow scares us and we're holding our version of how things should go with both hands. In this episode I take you into the Hebrew behind that verse, oz and hadar, and show you that these are God's own garments, not something you manufacture from inside yourself.
Strength is the power to open your hands and release what you have every right to keep. Dignity is the worth God gave you that no one can strip off, no matter how your husband behaves or how long the season lasts. I get practical about what this looks like in a hard marriage, and I show you how this verse exposes the idolatry hiding underneath the things we refuse to let go of. If you've been gripping and dreading, this one is for you.
For the women going deeper on this kind of teaching and the inner healing behind it, I'd love to see you at the Wise Wife Conference in Atlanta. Details at https://www.wisewife.co.
E37 Are You Ready for Restoration?
Women come to me to heal their marriages. Almost every time, what they needed was to heal themselves first. I know that is hard to hear when your husband is the one who looks broken. But I spent years so fixed …
Notas do episódio
Women come to me to heal their marriages. Almost every time, what they needed was to heal themselves first.
I know that is hard to hear when your husband is the one who looks broken. But I spent years so fixed on his wrongs that I nearly walked away from God over my own hurt and offense. This episode is about what God wants to heal in you while you wait on Him.
I walk through three things: why God can seem so slow to answer, what healing actually looks like, and why I pray He restores you before He restores your marriage. Then I teach the seven steps of spiritual wound care, the same protocol a doctor follows on a flesh wound, mapped onto how God heals a soul wound.
Resources:
- Fruit to the Root, my free soul-wound workbook: wisewife.co/root
- The Wise Wife Co mentorship community: https://www.wisewife.co/community-sp
- Episode 28, Should I Let Him Move Back In?, on boundaries versus demands
If this encouraged you, share it with a wife who needs hope today, and subscribe so you do not miss what comes next.
E36 Follow the Fruit to the Root
Years ago I walked into our bathroom and found raw sewage backing up into the toilet and the tub. We could have spent the rest of our lives scooping it out, or we could deal with the massive tree root that had …
Notas do episódio
Years ago I walked into our bathroom and found raw sewage backing up into the toilet and the tub. We could have spent the rest of our lives scooping it out, or we could deal with the massive tree root that had grown silently underground for decades until it finally broke the sewer line. Most women I coach are still scooping.
You've been trying to change the behavior. You've prayed harder, set up boundaries, read the books, listened to the podcasts, started over a hundred Mondays. The same patterns keep coming back. The anger, the control, the people-pleasing, the shutting down, the fear. This isn't about effort. You've been doing the work. The patterns keep coming back because the work has been happening at the wrong layer. The fruit you see grows from a root that is still alive underground.
This is part two of the series I started last week with the victim and the martyr. Last week I told you both of those identities were ditches and asked you to be honest about which one you lean toward. This week I show you how to climb out.
We talk about soul wounds, the unhealed emotional pains from your past that the enemy uses as a legal entry point to attach lies, accusations, shame, and fear. I explain why the most dangerous soul wound is the one you never acknowledged as a wound, and why a "great childhood" can still hide the filters that are running your life.
Then I share the five whys, the strategy I use with my wise wives to reverse engineer the visible bad fruit in your life all the way back to the root memory. From there, I give you five steps to actually heal it. Identify the fruit and the stronghold. Acknowledge the wound. Invite Jesus into the memory. Forgive and renounce the lies. Command the spirits to go.
You cannot forgive what you won't admit, and you cannot heal what you won't confront. By the end of this episode, you'll have the framework, the workbook, and the prayers to do the actual work.
Resources mentioned in this episode
- The Fruit to the Root workbook (free): https://www.wisewife.co/root
- Last week's episode: The Victim and the Martyr
- The Wise Wife Community: https://www.wisewife.co/community-sp
- Scripture: Matthew 18:21-35 (the parable of the unforgiving servant), Matthew 18:35, Luke 10:19
Here are the three key takeaways from this episode
- You cannot heal what you won't confront. The most dangerous soul wound is not the biggest one. It's the one you never acknowledged as a wound. A "normal" or "great" childhood does not mean you escaped without filters. Some of the most controlling, fearful, people-pleasing patterns come from women who would say they had it good.
- Soul wounds give the enemy legal access. When a wound is delivered and not healed, the enemy attaches lies to it, and demons exploit those lies. Inner healing without deliverance is incomplete, and deliverance without inner healing is temporary. Forgiveness, renouncing the lies out loud, and commanding the spirits to go in Jesus' name is how the door gets closed.
- The five whys take you from fruit to root. Pick one piece of bad fruit. Anger, control, fear, resentment, people-pleasing, stonewalling. Ask why. Answer honestly. Ask why again. Keep going past the noble, convenient answer until you find the earliest memory of feeling the way the fruit is making you feel now. That memory is usually the wound. That is where Jesus wants to meet you.
Subscribe and review
If this episode met you somewhere, do one thing for me. Hit subscribe on Apple Podcasts or Spotify, and leave a quick review. Reviews are what put this show in front of the next woman who needs to hear that the root, not the sewage, is the real problem. Thank you for being here.
E35 Victim vs Martyr - How to Share Your Story Well
There are two sinful responses to trauma, and most of us are living in one of them. The victim is sharing her story compulsively, looking for someone to confirm her pain is real. The martyr is stuffing it all …
Notas do episódio
There are two sinful responses to trauma, and most of us are living in one of them. The victim is sharing her story compulsively, looking for someone to confirm her pain is real. The martyr is stuffing it all down and calling that strength. Today I'm naming both, exposing the root wounds that drive each one, and showing you what it actually looks like to share your story well, with discernment, with dignity, and without destroying the covenant or yourself. This episode will ruffle your feathers.
Resources mentioned: Subscribe to The Wise Wife Letters at www.wisewife.co for prayers and resources to help you start anointing your home, your husband, and your family.
Join us in Atlanta: The Wise Wife Conference is coming September 12–13, 2026. Find out more at www.wisewife.co
If this episode encouraged you, share it with another wife who needs hope today. And if you want to go deeper, join us inside the Wise Wife Mentorship at www.wisewife.co
E34 My Marriage Stand Part 3 - How He Came Home
My Marriage Stand: Part 3 — How He Came Home I got the call I had been fasting and praying for. Tim's opening line was, "Natasha, I don't love you. I haven't loved you in a really long time." I dropped to my …
Notas do episódio
My Marriage Stand: Part 3 — How He Came Home
I got the call I had been fasting and praying for. Tim's opening line was, "Natasha, I don't love you. I haven't loved you in a really long time."
I dropped to my knees.
Not because the words were good. They were the worst sales pitch of all time. But I knew in my spirit that something had broken.
This is Part 3, the final episode of my full marriage restoration story. Parts one and two covered the breakdown and the year of separation. This one is about what God used to break through to Tim, what the call actually sounded like, what the first two years of being back together cost me, and what I want you to take with you if you're standing right now.
Don't skip to this one. Go back and start at Part 1. You need that context. But if you're ready, let's finish the story.
God did not bring Tim home the way I expected. No dramatic repentance at my door. No apology. He called to say he hoped to one day love me again, and for the next two years, he made good on that. He really didn't feel anything for me. And I had to choose, almost every day, whether I was going to fight in the flesh or fight in the spirit.
Most Sundays I kissed him on the cheek, smiled, and went to church alone with the boys. My flesh wanted to slam the door.
Key Takeaways
God did not use who I expected. I spent years praying that someone would say the right thing to Tim. People from church, people from work, all of them offering to reach out. And I kept releasing them from that because God didn't need them. He got through to Tim using the other woman. The one I had been asking Him to remove. Stop managing how He does it.
The call did not sound like victory. "I don't love you. I haven't loved you in a really long time. But I can't see my life without the boys, and I hope to one day love you again." That was it. But I heard what God was saying behind those words, and I dropped to my knees in gratitude. You have to be anchored enough in the Lord to hear what the Spirit is saying when the words are not what you wanted.
Coming home is not the same as coming back. Tim came home physically. For the next two years I was still proving out the work. He saw that I had changed, but he did not trust it yet. Two years physically back together before emotional connection. Two more years after that before he came back to the Lord. Know what you are actually standing in.
Abigail exists because neither of us quit. Our daughter, our restoration baby, born 13 years after the twins. She would not be here if I had given in to my hurt feelings or Tim to his stubbornness. She is what obedience looks like with skin on.
The sanctification was the point. The biggest gain from those years was not getting my marriage back. It was what God built in me through it. Even if Tim had never come home, I would still thank God for that season. The woman He made me into, I would not trade her. Seek His kingdom first, and all these things get added. That is the whole testimony.
Resources
Wise Wife Conference 2026 — Atlanta https://www.wisewife.co/wise-wife-conference-2026
Wise Wife Co Community https://www.wisewife.co/community-sp
The Wise Wife Letters — Weekly Newsletter https://www.wisewife.co/newsletters/the-wise-wife-letters/
This is Part 3 of 3. Start at the beginning: Part 1 — I Hated My Husband.
E34 My Marriage Stand Part 2
My Marriage Stand: Part 2 — What God Did With the Wreckage He moved out. I was at the house with the boys. And by God's grace, I did not lose my mind. That surprised me more than anything, because nothing about …
Notas do episódio
My Marriage Stand: Part 2 — What God Did With the Wreckage
He moved out. I was at the house with the boys. And by God's grace, I did not lose my mind.
That surprised me more than anything, because nothing about how I'd been living had prepared me for dignified separation. There was not a single fleshly reason I should have held it together when he was packing that car, but I did.
What followed was the hardest year of my life. Tim was gone, done, and not shy about saying he was never coming back. Meanwhile, the Holy Spirit took full advantage of the opening. Rotten layer after rotten layer, every part of my wretchedness exposed. This is Part 2 of my full marriage restoration story, and I'm telling you exactly how that year gutted me and what God asked me to do with it.
Key Takeaways
The first key to saving my marriage was that I stopped looking at his wretchedness. Tim was doing what Tim was doing that year, and it was bad. What I had to do was stop staring at it. That is not the same as excusing it or pretending it isn't real, but you cannot change yourself and obsess over him at the same time. Looking at yourself with truth, not condemnation, is where the actual work starts.
Obedience feels like freedom when you step into it. God convicted me to quit my job. Not to perform change for Tim, not to make myself look better. He showed me I had put my career on an altar and sacrificed my marriage, my children, and my soul on it. Quitting was obedience, and the moment I stepped into it, I tasted freedom I had never felt before. Take one idol down and God shows you the next one.
Spiritual warfare became my education that year. I had never heard of it before. Daniel chapter 10 was my first real encounter with the reality of spiritual battle, a literal war in the heavenly realm, an angel warring the Prince of Persia for 21 days. I was 26 years old with no grid for any of it.
That was the beginning of everything I now teach about warring in the spirit.
Resources
Wise Wife Conference 2026 — Atlanta https://www.wisewife.co/wise-wife-conference-2026
Wise Wife Co Community https://www.wisewife.co/community-sp
The Wise Wife Letters — Weekly Newsletter https://www.wisewife.co/newsletters/the-wise-wife-letters/
This is Part 2/3. Part 3 is coming soon
E34 My Marriage Stand, Part 1
My Marriage Stand: Part 1 — I Hated My Husband There was a time I hated my husband. Not the small kind of hate. The kind where you lie awake at night wondering if you married your mortal enemy. And the part …
Notas do episódio
My Marriage Stand: Part 1 — I Hated My Husband
There was a time I hated my husband. Not the small kind of hate. The kind where you lie awake at night wondering if you married your mortal enemy.
And the part that's even harder to say? I thought I was the good one.
This is Part 1 of a 3-part series where I'm telling my full story. Not the cleaned up version. The actual story of how my marriage died, what was really happening underneath it, and what God did with all of it.
In this episode I talk about how we met, what we both brought into the marriage that we never dealt with, the slow collapse that followed, and the moment I found out it was over. I gave up on my marriage. Then I gave up on God. And that's where Part 1 ends.
If you're in a hard marriage right now, this one is for you. Not because it's going to be easy to hear, but because I'm not going to pretend it was easy to live.
Key Takeaways
We both came into marriage with idolatry. I wanted Tim to be my spiritual leader, my validator, my everything. He came in with a survival mentality. Neither of us knew what we were doing, and nobody in the church had equipped us for any of it.
The turtling is the most dangerous place. When a wife has tried and tried and finally just shuts down and concedes, that's not peace. That's the enemy's finish line.
Giving up on your marriage is bad but recoverable. Giving up on God is the real crisis. That's what I did, and that's what the enemy was after the whole time.
My heart posture was the problem. There was truth in everything I was bringing to God. But I was bringing it as a victim demanding a verdict, not as a wife asking what needed to change in me.
The more he failed, the more controlling I became. And the more controlling I became, the more he withdrew. We fed each other's worst patterns for years before anything broke open.
Resources
Wise Wife Conference 2026 — Atlanta https://www.wisewife.co/wise-wife-conference-2026
Wise Wife Co Community https://www.wisewife.co/community-sp
The Wise Wife Letters — Weekly Newsletter https://www.wisewife.co/newsletters/the-wise-wife-letters/
This is Part 1 of 3. Part 2 — What God Did With the Wreckage — is coming soon.
The Power Isn't in the Oil: What Anointing Actually Does
Anointing your house, your husband's pillow, your kids' foreheads, your kitchen sink — none of it does anything if you don't actually believe God is who He says He is. In this episode, Natasha answers a …
Notas do episódio
Anointing your house, your husband's pillow, your kids' foreheads, your kitchen sink — none of it does anything if you don't actually believe God is who He says He is. In this episode, Natasha answers a question one of our Wise Wives asked about anointing oil. What is it? Why do people use it? Does it actually do anything? She walks through the biblical roots of anointing — David being set apart for the throne, oil consecrating priests and sacred items, the Holy Spirit's presence symbolized through oil — and then turns to the New Testament instruction in James 5:14 to show what carries the real weight in anointing: prayer, faith, and the name of the Lord.
Then she calls something out - there is a religious spirit that turns anointing oil into performance. It feeds self-sufficiency, it looks holy and produces nothing. Natasha shows the difference between obedience and performance, and why one woman's anointing carries authority while another woman's is just oil on a doorframe. She also tells the story of the first time she ever anointed something — her separated husband's space pen — and what God did with it.
In this episode:
- The biblical roots of anointing oil and why it was used to consecrate
- What 1 Samuel 16:13 reveals about oil and the Holy Spirit
- James 5:14 and what actually carries the weight in anointing
- The four declarations you make every time you anoint
- The religious spirit and how it turns obedience into performance
- Natasha's space pen story
Resources mentioned: Subscribe to The Wise Wife Letters at www.wisewife.co for prayers and resources to help you start anointing your home, your husband, and your family.
Join us in Atlanta: The Wise Wife Conference is coming September 12–13, 2026. Find out more at www.wisewife.co
If this episode encouraged you, share it with another wife who needs hope today. And if you want to go deeper, join us inside the Wise Wife Mentorship at www.wisewife.co
He Says He Believes in God But Doesn't Act Like It
He says he believes in God. So why doesn't it show? If you've ever felt like something isn't adding up in your marriage — your head saying one thing, your spirit saying another — this episode is for you. In …
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He says he believes in God. So why doesn't it show?
If you've ever felt like something isn't adding up in your marriage — your head saying one thing, your spirit saying another — this episode is for you.
In this episode, Natasha breaks down one of the most confusing and painful situations a Christian wife can face: a husband who professes faith but shows no fruit. Drawing from her own marriage story and 15+ years of walking alongside women, she gives you clarity on exactly what you're dealing with and how to fight — the right way.
In this episode:
- The 3 categories of husbands — and why knowing which one you're dealing with changes everything
- Why quoting scripture to your husband might actually be making things worse
- What 1 Peter 3 actually means — and what it doesn't
- Why you are not your husband's Holy Spirit — and what happens when you try to be
- The difference between standing for your marriage and maintaining an illusion out of fear
Scriptures referenced: 1 Corinthians 2:14 · James 2:19 · Luke 6:46 · 1 John 5:19 · Colossians 1:13 · 1 Peter 3:1-2 · 1 Corinthians 7:15
Fearless Faith
Are you stuck in a cycle of managing, controlling, and worrying — and wondering why nothing ever changes? The root isn't your circumstances, it's fear. In this episode of The Wise Wife Podcast, Natasha dives …
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Are you stuck in a cycle of managing, controlling, and worrying — and wondering why nothing ever changes? The root isn't your circumstances, it's fear.
In this episode of The Wise Wife Podcast, Natasha dives deep into what fearless faith actually is — not the street-corner shouting kind, but the kind that let David face Goliath, kept the apostles standing under torture, and can keep you standing no matter what your marriage, family, or life throws at you.
You'll learn:
- Why fear is bondage rooted in self-reliance — not just an emotion
- Why positive thinking, affirmations, and coping strategies will never truly heal anxiety
- The difference between legalism and genuine fearless faith
- How to stop living like a peasant when you're actually an heir
- What Psalm 91 looks like when you actually dwell there — not just visit This episode will challenge you, but it might also set you free.
📍 Wise Wife Conference: Atlanta, Sept 12–13 | https://www.wisewife.co/wise-wife-conference-2026
💬 Join The Wise Wife Community | https://wisewife.co
Reality Discipline in Marriage (Stop Trying to Fix Your Husband)
Many wives feel trapped in a cycle of trying to fix, manage, or carry the weight of their husband’s choices, only to end up exhausted, frustrated, and stuck. In this episode, Natasha breaks down a powerful and …
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Many wives feel trapped in a cycle of trying to fix, manage, or carry the weight of their husband’s choices, only to end up exhausted, frustrated, and stuck. In this episode, Natasha breaks down a powerful and often misunderstood concept: reality discipline.
Originally taught in parenting, this principle has profound implications for marriage, especially when you’re dealing with sin, dysfunction, or unhealthy patterns. This is not about control, or manipulation, and it’s definitely not about passive compliance. It’s about stepping out of the way, holding your ground with strength and dignity, and allowing God (and reality) to do what you cannot.
If you’ve been trying everything to create change and nothing is working, this episode will reframe the battle and show you a better way forward.
What You’ll Learn
- Why trying to “fix” your husband often backfires
- The difference between biblical submission and unbiblical compliance
- The most common flesh-driven responses(and why they don’t work)
- What reality discipline actually is (and how it applies in marriage)
- The critical difference between applying consequences vs. allowing them
- How to set boundaries without anger, control, or fear
- Why this is a spiritual battle, not just a marriage problem
Key Scripture Referenced
John 10:10
Resources & Next Steps
Two Types of Prodigals Course
Learn to discern the root stronghold driving your husband’s behavior, and how to respond in a way that doesn’t make it worse.
👉 https://www.wisewife.co/two-types-of-prodigals-course-launchsale-sp
Wise Wife Community
Join weekly live coaching, teaching, and support as you walk this out in real time.
👉 https://www.wisewife.co/community-sp
Wise Wife Conference (Atlanta, GA) September 12–13, 2026
👉 https://www.wisewife.co/wise-wife-conference-2026
Connect with Wise Wife
Website: https://wisewife.co
Share This Episode!
If this episode encouraged you, share it with another wife who needs hope today. You are not called to carry what only God can change. Stand firm in truth, walk in wisdom, and trust Him to do the work.
Should I Submit in This Case? What Biblical Submission Actually Looks Like
“How do I submit in this situation?” It’s one of the most common—and most misunderstood—questions in Christian marriage. In this episode, Natasha addresses a real-life scenario from a wife who feels stuck …
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“How do I submit in this situation?” It’s one of the most common—and most misunderstood—questions in Christian marriage. In this episode, Natasha addresses a real-life scenario from a wife who feels stuck carrying the weight of her household while her husband avoids responsibility. But instead of giving a surface-level answer, she reframes the question entirely: It’s not just “how do I submit?” It’s “should I submit in this?” Inside this conversation, you’ll learn: - Why submission is often misunderstood in both Christian and secular spaces - The difference between biblical submission and enabling sinful behavior - The two extremes women fall into: the protector and the appeaser - Why both control and passivity are rooted in fear - What it actually looks like to live in the “spirit-led middle” - A simple 2-question framework to help you discern your response in difficult situations Natasha also shares personal examples from her own marriage, showing how choosing strength and dignity over fear became the catalyst for real transformation. This episode is not about compliance, and it's not about control. It’s about honoring God, walking in truth, and having the courage to stop getting in the way of what He is doing. Key Takeaway: Coddling and enabling sinful behavior is not love, it’s actually one of the most disrespectful things you can do to your husband. If this episode helped bring clarity to your situation, share it with a woman who may be asking the same question.
Ep. 28: He Wants To Come Home, But I Don’t Feel Secure in His Love
What do you do when your husband wants to come back, but not fully as a husband? In this episode, Natasha addresses a common and painful question from wives navigating broken marriages: how do you know whether …
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What do you do when your husband wants to come back, but not fully as a husband? In this episode, Natasha addresses a common and painful question from wives navigating broken marriages: how do you know whether letting him come home is wisdom or enabling dysfunction? She unpacks the difference between regret and repentance, explains what an “in-home prodigal” looks like, and shows why many women end up tolerating arrangements God never asked them to accept. This episode covers: regret vs. repentance boundaries vs. demands why fear makes women accept scraps how children learn marriage from what is normalized why you must stop absorbing consequences that belong to your husband what it really looks like to respond in strength and dignity If your husband wants the benefits of home without the responsibility of covenant, this episode will help you discern the difference and respond with wisdom, truth, and dignity.
Episode 27: You Are More Than Just a Rib
In this episode of The Wise Wife Podcast, Natasha takes a closer look at the Genesis creation account and explores the Hebrew words often translated as “man,” “helper,” and “rib.” What if the story of Adam and …
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In this episode of The Wise Wife Podcast, Natasha takes a closer look at the Genesis creation account and explores the Hebrew words often translated as “man,” “helper,” and “rib.”
What if the story of Adam and Eve is richer than the simplified version many of us learned growing up? What if woman was never meant to be understood as an afterthought, but as fully present in God’s original design for humanity from the beginning?
Natasha walks through key Hebrew terms in Genesis 1 and 2, including adam, ha’adam, ezer kenegdo, tsela, and banah, and explains how these words can open up a deeper understanding of identity, covenant, and God’s intentional design for women and marriage.
This episode is especially for women who have struggled to receive the love of God apart from performance, usefulness, or relational validation. If your identity has been shaped by the belief that your worth begins in someone else’s need, this conversation offers a biblical foundation that points back to where your worth truly begins: in the image of God.
In this episode:
Why “Adam” in Genesis does not initially function as a male personal name
The meaning of ha’adam as “the human”
What ezer kenegdo really communicates about a wife’s role
Why the Hebrew word often translated “rib” may be better understood as “side”
How translation history shaped the traditional “rib” interpretation
Why this matters for a woman’s identity in Christ
How Genesis reframes worth, purpose, and covenantal design
Key takeaway:
Your worth does not begin in Adam’s need. Your worth begins in God’s image.Episode 26: The One Thing That Will Keep You "Standing" Forever
Some women who believe they’re “standing for their marriage” are actually stuck in idolatry. Not devotion. Not faith. Idolatry. Because if your husband leaving has turned you into an emotional wreck who can’t …
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Some women who believe they’re “standing for their marriage” are actually stuck in idolatry.
Not devotion.
Not faith.
Idolatry.
Because if your husband leaving has turned you into an emotional wreck who can’t function, can’t sleep, can’t eat, can’t think about anything else… that’s a type of worship, rather than biblical strength.
And on the other side of the story, many of the spouses who leave are also in idolatry.
But their idol isn’t marriage, it’s happiness.
They believe their personal happiness gives them permission to break their vows and sin against God.
So today we’re going to talk about the two idols destroying modern marriages:
The idol of marriage itself, and the idol of personal happiness.
And we’re going to look at one of the most shocking tests of loyalty in the Bible - when God asked Abraham to sacrifice Isaac.
Because sometimes God will ask you to lay down the very thing you wanted most, just to prove it’s not your god.
Episode 25: Should Christians go to marriage counseling?
“Should Christians go to marriage counseling?” It’s one of the most common questions I hear from Christian wives in marital crisis. In this episode, I walk through the difference between godly sorrow and …
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“Should Christians go to marriage counseling?” It’s one of the most common questions I hear from Christian wives in marital crisis. In this episode, I walk through the difference between godly sorrow and worldly sorrow, change versus transformation, and how to discern whether counseling in your season will support sanctification, or reinforce control and victimhood. This conversation is about peace, alignment, and learning to move with what God is actually doing.
Ep. 24 When God Humbles You Through Circumstances
In this Wise Swipe Podcast episode, I teach from Hezekiah’s story (2 Chronicles 32; 2 Kings 19) to encourage women standing for their marriages. I explain how idols create open doors for attack, why scrambling …
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In this Wise Swipe Podcast episode, I teach from Hezekiah’s story (2 Chronicles 32; 2 Kings 19) to encourage women standing for their marriages. I explain how idols create open doors for attack, why scrambling and compromise never satisfy the enemy, and why God doesn’t need our help—He wants obedience, trust, and surrender. I share how mockery and fear try to intimidate faith, how reaping and sowing can bring painful but necessary consequences, and how deliverance came when Hezekiah humbled himself and appealed to God’s name. I also share my own experience of shifting from striving to surrendered prayer, warn that pride can follow breakthrough, and close with a prayer for repentance, healing, and renewed courage to trust God as our defender.
For information about the new course, The Two Types of Prodigals, visit www.wisewife.co
Ep 23 When Marriage Advice Sounds Biblical But is Stealing Your Breakthrough
In this episode of The Wise Wife, Natasha addresses a blind spot many Christian women don’t realize they have: consuming voices that sound helpful, feel validating, and claim biblical values, while subtly …
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In this episode of The Wise Wife, Natasha addresses a blind spot many Christian women don’t realize they have: consuming voices that sound helpful, feel validating, and claim biblical values, while subtly contradicting God’s design for marriage, authority, and obedience.
Natasha walks through how spiritual compromise often enters quietly—not through rebellion, but through “good resources,” popular podcasts, bestselling books, and music we don’t think twice about.
She introduces the concept of covenantal hypocrisy: Asking God to bless a covenant we aren’t fully submitted to.
This episode challenges:
- The belief that intention matters more than obedience
- The idea that you can heal spiritually without repentance
- The assumption that popular Christian advice is automatically sound
Natasha also addresses well-known marriage teachings that many women trust—breaking down why some advice appeals to the flesh, reinforces control, and bypasses true surrender, even when it’s labeled “biblical.”
This is an episode about discernment.
About influence.
About whether Jesus is truly Lord, not just Savior.
Ep 22 | Should I Let Him Move Back In? (The In-Home Prodigal)
Natasha answers a listener question -- one that she receives often -- in how to navigate a prodigal husband who wants to "come home" but isn't showing any signs of repentance or remorse. In this episode …
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Natasha answers a listener question -- one that she receives often -- in how to navigate a prodigal husband who wants to "come home" but isn't showing any signs of repentance or remorse. In this episode, Natasha explains the biblical framework she uses to help make wise decisions when faced with difficult situations.
Ep 21 | Meekness is Not Weakness
Use code FIRE25 for $50 to the upcoming Wise Wife Conference! Find out more details here: https://mentorship.wisewifeblueprint.com/wise-wife-fall-retreat-2025
Ep.20 | How to Pray in the Spirit and Destroy the Enemy’s Schemes for Your Life
Today on the Wise Wife Podcast, Natasha explores praying "in the Spirit," including speaking in tongues. We'll learn about the power of this form of prayer for personal edification, intercession, and spiritual …
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Today on the Wise Wife Podcast, Natasha explores praying "in the Spirit," including speaking in tongues. We'll learn about the power of this form of prayer for personal edification, intercession, and spiritual warfare and talk about why it's important for EVERY believer. Come with expectation and FAITH that you can be baptized in the Holy Spirit!
Ep 19 | Understanding the Spiritual Realm, How to Wage War Against Satan and His Minions, and Why we Must Wield the Sword of the Spirit
In this episode, we near the conclusion of our Armor of God series by recapping what we’ve learned about standing firm against evil, as outlined in Ephesians 6. This isn’t metaphorical or abstract; it’s …
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In this episode, we near the conclusion of our Armor of God series by recapping what we’ve learned about standing firm against evil, as outlined in Ephesians 6. This isn’t metaphorical or abstract; it’s preparation for a literal spiritual battle raging over our souls, families, and legacies. We explore the Bible’s depiction of an organized, hierarchical demonic realm and how understanding this reality transforms the way we view spiritual tools like prayer, fasting, and the armor of God. Natasha addresses misconceptions about the spiritual realm, explaining its structure and emphasizing that our good works empower our side of the battle, not to earn God’s favor, but to move the needle in this unseen war. She also warns against the dangers of becoming prideful or fascinated with spiritual authority, urging listeners to remain rooted in Jesus, who alone gives us victory. This episode challenges listeners to see spiritual warfare as real, urgent, and relevant to their daily lives, while reminding them that Christ’s power enables them to stand firm and finish strong.
Ep. 18 | The Helmet of Salvation is More than Just Being "Saved"
In this episode, Natasha continues the Armor of God series with a deep dive into the Helmet of Salvation. She challenges listeners to move beyond surface-level understanding of salvation and instead embrace its …
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In this episode, Natasha continues the Armor of God series with a deep dive into the Helmet of Salvation. She challenges listeners to move beyond surface-level understanding of salvation and instead embrace its transformative power. Natasha explores how the enemy targets our identity, distorts our purpose, and uses pride or shame to separate us from God. She unpacks what it means to have an eternal mindset, how salvation equips us to finish strong, and why our identity in Christ is the key to victory over spiritual attacks, especially when we are being called to fight for our marriage without signs of hope in our natural circumstances. This episode is a must-listen for anyone seeking deeper faith, clarity of purpose, and unshakable confidence in their salvation.
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