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共读《无条件养育》:夸赞、惩罚、冷处理,都是在悄悄撤回「爱」| Vol.185

November 6, 2026 · 1 h 36 min

Show notes

这期我们聊聊美国学者艾尔菲·科恩的《无条件养育》。这个选题是老六提议的,书的内容引发了他对爱与关系的思考;而作为两个孩子的妈妈,我开始重新审视自己常说的“你真棒”。当孩子追着问“妈妈,我棒不棒?”,我不禁反思:夸奖究竟是在给他信心,还是让他越来越依赖别人的评价?
我们都不是育儿专家,这期想做的,是从各自的生活经验出发,认真聊聊这本书。老六从自己被养育的经历、与伴侣的相处去理解,我则带着每天与两个孩子相处时的困惑来对照。有些观点让我们很受启发,也有些地方值得商榷。于是我们聊夸奖与惩罚、尊重与放任,也聊当孩子选了一条父母不认可的路时,爱该如何表达。
聊着聊着,我们发现《无条件养育》谈的可能不只是孩子,也是在提醒每个成年人:爱一个人,是想让他符合自己的期待,还是让他感到被看见、被接纳?如果不再有用、不再优秀,甚至犯了错,我们还愿意爱自己吗?希望这期节目能陪你一起想想这些问题,而不是急着找到一个标...去小宇宙查看完整单集简介
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