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Is Suffering a Type of Spiritual Intercourse?, Anxious About Mutual Climax, How Do I Hear God About Marriage? | ACW375

March 9, 2026 · 49 min

Show notes

Questions answered this episode:

  1. You often say the cross is the marriage bed. If Jesus took on all suffering there, can embracing our own suffering be a marital act? When we accept daily sufferings—from trauma to small annoyances—does that become, bluntly, a kind of spiritual intercourse? What would that mean practically? I’d love your thoughts.
  2. My husband and I have been married three years and have never climaxed at the same time. I feel frustrated and even scrupulous about it. I’ve heard that simultaneous climax is ideal, but I don’t understand how that’s physically possible. When I’m left unsatisfied after my husband finishes, I worry it’s sinful for him to help me climax afterward. How can we pursue mutual climax without becoming scrupulous or overly technical?
  3. I’m almost 33 and have been with my boyfriend for five years. We’ve grown deeply in faith, and he’s a wonderful Catholic man. I long for marriage and children, but I’m stuck discerning whether he’s the one. I’ve prayed fervently, gone to adoration, and tried to surrender my anxieties to God, yet I feel no clarity. Time feels like it’s running out, and he’s patiently waiting. How do I truly hear God’s voice in such a big decision?



Resources:

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Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.


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