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096 17 Years on Meth, I Discovered the Truth About Healing

5 janvier 2026 · 49 min

Notes de l’épisode

A single line of meth made the world go quiet for Jason—and for years he chased that silence through dealing, manufacturing, and a life that looked powerful on the outside while hollowing him out within. He tells us how constant moves as a kid shaped a deep need to be chosen, and how that unmet need made the first high feel like belonging. The spiral accelerated: selling to fund the feeling, inventing rules to feel “safe,” and convincing himself that politeness and profit weren’t in conflict with harm. Even a “geographic” reset couldn’t outrun the pattern; drugs found him again, an apartment was stripped clean, and the streets of Vegas became home.

Then came the sentence that changed everything: “I’m pregnant.” Jason quit cold turkey and went home to a grandmother who held him without judgment. But the story didn’t end at sobriety. He overcorrected into promotions, degrees, and corporate prestige—until open bars, status, and cocaine replayed the old melody in a sharper key. A 0.38 DUI, crushing grief, and a near-suicidal drive toward a tree became the second bottom that forced him into rehab and an honest inventory of the self he kept dragging from city to city.

The breakthrough arrived in therapy: look your younger self in the eyes and tell him what you’ve done with his life. That moment reframed his mission. Jason now believes the opposite of addiction is being seen—by others and by the parts of ourselves we’ve abandoned. He lays out practical recovery principles: radical willingness to change people and places, building a safe bubble when needed, daily gratitude, refusing negativity, and verbalizing what you enjoy so your mind learns to follow it. Today he counsels others through his “Madness Method,” turning hard-won lessons into guidance that’s equal parts streetwise and compassionate.

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The Starter | Music, Memory & the Songs We Keep
You hear a song, and a memory opens up. Personal audio essays by Stephen Hollowell.

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