Who Really Has The Power in Your Relationship

You ask for help, but nothing happens. Eventually, you stop asking. Or you make a decision “for the family”—only to realize your needs are the ones that keep coming last.

In this episode of MissPerceived, Professor Leah Ruppanner unpacks three forms of power in relationships: the obvious power of saying no, the quieter power that stops you from asking, and the invisible power hidden inside decisions that seem fair. Drawing on sociological research and her own work on marital dynamics, Leah explores how everyday negotiations over housework, careers, and family responsibilities can leave one partner doing more while the other gets more say.

From the “nag paradox” to the thinking work behind supposedly shared decisions, this episode asks: Are you making choices for both of you—or consistently putting one person first? Leah also explores how partners trade support over time, when those trade-offs become unequal, and how to start making room for your own goals, rest, and ambitions.

In this episode

• Why ignoring a request can be an exercise of power.
• What happens when you stop asking because you already expect a no.
• How “we decided” can hide one person doing all the planning.
• Why decisions made “for us” don’t always benefit both partners.
• Recognizing when to push back and ask for what you need.

#MissPerceived #Relationships #RelationshipDynamics #InvisibleLabor #ProfLeahRuppanner

Follow Leah: @prof.leahruppanner

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