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The Imperfects

by The Imperfects

NewMissy Higgins & Dr Emily - Burnt Out But Still ParentingNovember 8, 2026 · 1 h 32 min
Episodes
309
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weekly
Latest episode
Nov 8, 2026
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About the podcast

We’re all imperfect. On this podcast, founder of The Resilience Project Hugh van Cuylenburg, his good friend Ryan Shelton, and only one of their brothers, Josh van Cuylenburg, talks to a variety of interesting people who vulnerably share their own struggles and imperfections, or expertly pass on their wisdom on the subject of imperfection. Whether it’s in The Vulnerabilitea House, The Academy of Imperfection, or with our very own psychologist, Dr Emily, The Imperfects are here to find some valuable takeaways we can all apply to our own imperfect lives.

Episodes 309

  1. Missy Higgins & Dr Emily - Burnt Out But Still Parenting

    1 h 32 minSeason 8 · Episode 42

    With Missy Higgins and Dr Emily Musgrove

    Do you feel the type of exhaustion that just doesn’t go away, even after a few good nights of sleep? Do you feel yourself becoming emotionally distant from your kids to protect yourself from huge emotions? Have …

    Show notes

    Do you feel the type of exhaustion that just doesn’t go away, even after a few good nights of sleep? Do you feel yourself becoming emotionally distant from your kids to protect yourself from huge emotions? Have you noticed that you’re feeling less joy from parenting moment? You might be in parental burnout.

    This episode isn’t about judgement, at all. Rather, we welcome you to an episode of the Imperfects which aims to make you feel seen, less guilty, less alone, as we’re joined by the very special two guests, Missy Higgins and Dr Emily Musgrove.

    💌 To join our journaling club, with 10,100 + others, subscribe to my imperfect email - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/

    We touch on the difference between depression and parental burnout, the risk factors of parental burnout, the perfect mother myth, and how to deal with perfectionistic tendencies.

    There SO MANY helpful things in this episode, and stories from Hugh, Josh, Missy and Em to make you feel like a good enough parent.

    Chapters

    • 00:00:00 TRAILER
    • 00:01:34 Missy returns: singer, songwriter and single parent
    • 00:05:20 Hugh's Burnout: When Everything Felt Impossible
    • 00:08:14 Defining Parental Burnout: It's Not About Your Kids
    • 00:12:58 Depression vs Burnout: How to Tell the Difference
    • 00:23:35 The Shock of Parenthood: Nobody Told Us It Would Be Like This
    • 00:29:06 My Cortisol is Where?!
    • 00:33:44 Escape Fantasies
    • 00:36:27 Our Parents Had It Easier: Tennis, Newspapers & Benign Neglect
    • 00:40:13 Perfectionism: The Biggest Risk Factor for Burnout
    • 00:46:13 The Chicken Nugget Meltdown: When Missy Snapped
    • 00:49:59 The Perfect Mother Myth: Intensive Motherhood Ideology
    • 00:52:34 Mental load, resentment + your partner
    • 00:58:55 Single Parenting & Separation: Missy's Experience
    • 01:09:52 Asking for Help: Why It's So Hard & Why We Must
    • 01:13:48 Rest is productive!
    • 01:24:07 Dropping your standards: becoming a good enough parent
    • 01:30:12 A Little More Imperfects

    🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode

    📚Things to research

    📺 Things to watch

    🩷For More Missy

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  2. Beginning For Beginners with Hamish Blake & James van Cuylenburg

    1 h 5 minSeason 8 · Episode 41

    With Hamish Blake and James van Cuylenburg

    Have we ruined the art of being a beginner?💌 To join our journaling club, with 9,900+ others, subscribe to my imperfect email - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/With guest host Hamish …

    Show notes

    Have we ruined the art of being a beginner?

    💌 To join our journaling club, with 9,900+ others, subscribe to my imperfect email - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/

    With guest host Hamish Blake, we welcome back friend (family?) of the show James van Cuylenburg to expertly guide us through beginners’ mindset: what is it, how can we harness it, and what is the best way to model it for our kids?

    In a time where kids are wanting to be the GOAT of a sport they learnt about yesterday, we’re winding back the clock to reframe the anger and frustration of trying a new skill, and to learn just how great persistence is for our identity.

    James leads us through why we avoid discomfort, the role of dopamine and reward, and when to allow ourselves to quit something.

    This episode contains lots of helpful advice for anyone wanting to adopt a beginners’ mindset, and embrace ‘friction maxing’ as their next expedition into embracing discomfort.

    Chapters

    • 00:00:00 The Beginner's Mindset
    • 00:01:32 Childhood Choir Days & The Pressure to Be the GOAT
    • 00:10:32 Frictionless Society: The Dopamine Problem
    • 00:22:08 Friction Maxxing: Inviting Discomfort Back In
    • 00:27:49 Process Over Product: Finding Joy in the Journey
    • 00:33:51 Persistence vs Endurance: The Art of Sticking With It
    • 00:49:20 The Zone of Proximal Development: The 5% Rule
    • 00:53:03 When Kids Get Angry: Co-Regulation & Small Wins
    • 00:56:22 Shame vs Motivation: The Choir Director's Mistake
    • 00:59:13 James Van Cuylenburg's New TV Show & Final Thoughts

    🫖If you liked this episode, you might also love

    📺 Things to watch

    🎧 Things to listen to

    📚Research to research

    🚲 Things to check out

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  3. How To Audit Your Mental Load with Prof. Leah Ruppanner

    1 h 8 minSeason 8 · Episode 40

    With Leah Ruppanner

    It’s time we talked about the mental load. Again.💌 To join our journaling club, with 9,900+ others, subscribe to my imperfect email - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/Consider this a …

    Show notes

    It’s time we talked about the mental load. Again.

    💌 To join our journaling club, with 9,900+ others, subscribe to my imperfect email - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/

    Consider this a companion episode to our infamous, most shared episode of 2023, The Elephant in the Relationship where Hugh and Penny introduced us to their mental load, and how they were trying to make it more equal in their relationship.

    Today we’re sprinkling in some expertise and scientific data, as we’re joined by Professor Leah Ruppanner who explains to Hugh, Ryan and Josh that there’s actually 8 different types of mental load, and not all of them are draining.

    Bringing examples from their own lives, Hugh, Ryan and Josh discuss with Leah why the mental load can seem like an insurmountable amount of emotional thinking, and how partners can better communicate to reduce anxiety-like symptoms and burnout.

    We chat to Leah about the exacerbation of the mental load when chronic illness becomes part of the equation, and how to manage the mental load when there is no one to share it with.

    Chapters

    • 00:00:00 – TRAILER
    • 00:02:02 – The Mental Load is life changing for relationships
    • 00:03:11 – Mental Load definition: emotional thinking work
    • 00:05:41 – 3 characteristics of the mental load
    • 00:08:00 – Mental Load vs Burnout: Treat Your Energy Like a Budget
    • 00:14:19 – The Elephant in Hugh & Penny’s Relationship
    • 00:16:50 – Type 1: Life Organisation
    • 00:17:20 – Type 2: Emotional Support
    • 00:18:00 – Type 3: Relationship Hygiene
    • 00:19:03 – Type 4: Dream Building
    • 00:20:26 – Type 5: Magic Making
    • 00:25:00 – Type 6: Individual Upkeep
    • 00:27:30 – Type 7: Safety
    • 00:28:00 – Type 8: Meta Care (Doom Scrolling and the Mental Load)
    • 00:29:56 – How to do a mental load audit with your partner
    • 00:34:09 – Align your energy with your goals
    • 00:36:25 – Delegating tasks vs sharing the mental load
    • 00:38:24 – Shift work vs running the business
    • 00:40:30 – Birthday presents and the perfect mother myth
    • 00:41:30 – Mess: do men really not see it?
    • 00:44:50 – Why women feel judged
    • 00:48:41 – “Good enough is good enough”
    • 00:54:13 – Mental load in same sex couples
    • 00:57:07 – Why perspective + empathy matters
    • 00:58:13 – Mental load when you’re single, or your partner won’t engage
    • 00:59:02 – What a cancer diagnosis does for priorities
    • 01:05:45 – A Little More Imperfects: Mental Load at Work

    🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode

    📚Things to read

    📺 Things to watch

    🂱 Things to do

    💝 Breast Cancer Support

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  4. “MND Took Everything” Matt Nable on Grief, Depression & What Really Matters

    1 h 10 minSeason 8 · Episode 39

    With Matt Nable

    In the end, Matt Nable wished his brother would give in.Motor neurone disease had taken everything, except his brother’s will to live.💌 To join our journaling club, with 9,000+ others, subscribe to my imperfect …

    Show notes

    In the end, Matt Nable wished his brother would give in.

    Motor neurone disease had taken everything, except his brother’s will to live.

    💌 To join our journaling club, with 9,000+ others, subscribe to my imperfect email - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/

    Joining us in the studio today is writer, actor, boxer, and former rugby league player, Matt Nable.

    Recognisable for playing infamous tough guys on screen (Arrow, Underbelly, The Dry), Matt’s experience of loss and mental ill health has starkly redefined what he believes it is to ‘be a man’.

    Using the analogy of a ‘double edged sword’, Matt explains his experience with bipolar and hypomania, and how those periods have lead to the best, and worst, decisions of his life.

    Matt is incredibly generous in sharing his experience of biological melancholia depression, and explores with Josh just how quickly everything can seem to unravel.

    Matt speaks about the immense grief he carries for his brother who passed away MND, and how he was able to move through this grief to find purpose and compassion.

    *Content Warning: today's episode includes a discussion about psilocybin. In Australia, psilocybin is a controlled substance. Outside of authorised clinical settings, its use, possession and supply are illegal. This episode is not medical advice, and we're not encouraging or endorsing illegal drug use. Psilocybin can carry serious risks, particularly when taken without professional screening and supervision. Our guest's experience is their own and won't be typical of everyone's. This episode also mentions suicide. If you're struggling with grief or your mental health, please speak with your GP or a mental health professional.

    🚨If you, or someone you know, are experiencing suicidal thoughts call lifeline on 13 11 14. In an emergency, call 000.

    Chapters

    • 00:00:00 – TRAILER
    • 00:02:48 – Childhood shapes who we are
    • 00:03:40 – What does it really mean to be tough?
    • 00:07:38 – Why Matt doesn’t think he is a tough man
    • 00:09:21 – Redefining Masculinity, and Rejecting the Manosphere
    • 00:12:00 – Letting Go of Ego
    • 00:13:34 – Losing his brother to MND
    • 00:20:40 – A Psilocybin Retreat for Grief: Matt’s Experience
    • 00:23:08 – Meeting his younger self
    • 00:24:09 – Reaching Acceptance
    • 00:28:34 – Figuring out what really matters
    • 00:35:12 – A brother’s love: Hugh & Josh reflect
    • 00:38:55 – Finding humour in grief
    • 00:40:34 – A Parent’s Grief vs a Sibling’s Grief
    • 00:41:30 – The Meaning of Matt’s Tattoos
    • 00:42:10 – Bipolar II + Melancholic Depression Diagnosis
    • 00:43:46 – Hypomania: The Double-Edged Sword
    • 00:46:52 – Matt’s rise to fame
    • 00:51:10 – Bipolar vs Depression: The Crash, Exhaustion + Regret
    • 00:52:34 – Sitting with someone in the dark
    • 00:54:08 – The Quicksand of Men’s Mental Health
    • 00:56:02 – Standing on the Edge: Josh’s Story
    • 00:58:01 – Finding Joy in the Small Moments
    • 01:01:29 – Writing as an Anchor Point
    • 01:07:29 – Why men need to be vulnerable
    • 01:07:59 – Journaling Club “How would you like to be remembered?”

    Some other great resources are below

    📚Things to read

    📺 Things to watch

    Things to donate to

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

    Trailer footage sourced from Mr Inbetween.

  5. Zoë Foster Blake - Perimenopause, ADHD & Everything That Helped with Dr Fatima Khan

    1 h 30 minSeason 8 · Episode 38

    With Zoe Foster Blake and Dr Fatima Khan

    This is not your mother’s perimenopause.💌 To join our journaling club, subscribe to my imperfect email - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/Joined by guest host Zoë Foster Blake, and Dr …

    Show notes

    This is not your mother’s perimenopause.

    💌 To join our journaling club, subscribe to my imperfect email - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/

    Joined by guest host Zoë Foster Blake, and Dr Fatima Khan, we’re diving head first into perimenopause: the what, the why, and the how-the-f**k to deal with it.

    Typically beginning in your late 30’s, and in your brain of all places, perimenopause symptoms include heightened anxiety, irritability, sleep disturbances, brain fog … all things that make you feel further and further away from your best self.

    Beginning 5 -7 years BEFORE your last menstrual period, perimenopause can coincide with postpartum, the most important presentation of your career to date, and the uncovering of neurodivergence, which may have been painstakingly masked until this shift in hormones.

    With the expertise of Dr Fatima, and the lived experience of Zoë, we hope this episode makes you feel seen, less alone, and ready to have THAT conversation with your GP.

    Chapters

    • 00:00:00 The Truth of Perimenopause [TRAILER]
    • 00:01:09 The Meet Cute of Zoe Foster Blake and Dr Fatima Khan
    • 00:06:55 Is this Perimenopause? Early Signs + Symptoms
    • 00:07:41 Zoe’s Perimenopause Journey: No Sleep, Anxiety, Rage, Repeat.
    • 00:09:56 Volcanic Rage, Explained
    • 00:14:59 What Doctor’s Miss: Misdiagnosis + Antidepressants
    • 00:15:57 Why Your Husband Is Breathing Too Loud
    • 00:20:18 Perimenopause Mental Health Screening
    • 00:21:25 Debunking the “You’re Too Young” Myth
    • 00:23:43 Is it Anxiety? Depression? Perimenopause?
    • 00:25:26 The Pill, The Mirena + The Modern Woman in Peri
    • 00:30:44 Loosing Yourself in Peri: Brain Fog + Dementia Fears
    • 00:32:10 The Importance of Testosterone
    • 00:36:00 HRT Myths: Re-educating a generation
    • 00:39:04 A Script for a Script: What to say to your GP
    • 00:41:12 Perimenopause Is a Multi-Organ Syndrome
    • 00:46:09 High Achieving Women + Peri = Shame
    • 00:46:47 When Perimenopause Unmasks Your ADHD
    • 00:54:26 Trauma Reactivation in Perimenopause
    • 00:57:17 Pills + Skills: Why HRT Alone Isn’t Enough
    • 00:58:41 The Longevity of It All
    • 01:00:30 Nutrition

    📚Things to read

    💻Things to check out

    🎧Imperfects episodes for MORE on hormones

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  6. How OCD Hijacks Your Brain with Angie Greene

    1 h 11 minSeason 8 · Episode 37

    Angie’s OCD obsessions are that she has committed her worst, most insidious, fears.💌 Join 9,500+ others in our newsletter community - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/Officially …

    Show notes

    Angie’s OCD obsessions are that she has committed her worst, most insidious, fears.

    💌 Join 9,500+ others in our newsletter community - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/

    Officially diagnosed with obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD) when she was 19, some of Angie’s earliest memories are of obsessions, compulsions and seeking reassurance.

    Joining us in the studio, Angie talks to Hugh, Ryan and Josh about the reality of living with OCD, how she navigates particularly bad episodes with her partner, and why she wouldn’t wish it on her worst enemy

    Angie explains false memories, and the lengths she has gone to seek reassurance, and finally, why it is so important to her to create something that helps people feel less alone.

    In amongst all of the OCD chat, Hugh asks Angie about her anti-discrimination work and the beautiful story of where that passion came from.

    Chapters

    • 00:00:00 – Trailer
    • 00:01:27 – Angie + Hugh don’t do small talk
    • 00:03:46 – Why Angie accepted an ARIA on behalf of Sia
    • 00:05:45 – Growing Up in Sporting Royalty
    • 00:07:45 – Why Angie’s Brother Came Out To Her
    • 00:10:41 – “I’m Crying Because I Could Have Helped”
    • 00:13:21 – Why Feeling Safe To Be Yourself Matters
    • 00:15:02 – Angie’s Moral Compass: Where Does It Come From?
    • 00:18:17 – OCD: Obsessions, Compulsions + Reassurance
    • 00:20:45 – OCD Stereotypes vs Reality
    • 00:22:52 – Feeling Like A Bad Kid
    • 00:24:52 – Why OCD Makes Your Excruciatingly Self-Aware
    • 00:28:02 – Examples of Intrusive Thoughts
    • 00:30:23 – Invisible Compulsions: Kissing, Hugging, Incest
    • 00:32:19 – Relationship OCD: Constant Fear of Cheating On Your Partner
    • 00:34:37 – OCD False Memories: How The Brain Builds ‘Evidence’
    • 00:36:10 – Why Reassurance Seeking Never Brings Relief
    • 00:39:13 – What It’s Like Loving Someone With OCD
    • 00:41:40 – What OCD Has Cost Angie: Peace, Presence + Precious Moments
    • 00:50:08 – Why Getting The Right Treatment Was Lifechanging
    • 00:54:52 – What Exposure Response Prevention (ERP) Actually Looks Like
    • 00:57:02 – How To Support Someone With OCD
    • 00:59:01 – How Angie and Her Husband Manage OCD Episodes
    • 01:02:53 – Finding Your People Through OCD
    • 01:05:15 – How To Respond When Someone Tells You They Have OCD
    • 01:08:24 – Tips for Supporting Someone Who Has OCD

    🧠If you, or someone you know, has been diagnosed with or thinks they may have OCD, these are some great resources. In an emergency, always call 000.

    🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode

    💻Things to check out

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  7. Luke Bateman - Gambling With My Life

    1 h 16 minSeason 8 · Episode 36

    Mid 20's and $250,000 in debt. Gripped by a gambling addiction. How do you recover? 💌 Join 9,500+ others in our newsletter community - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/ From the …

    Show notes

    Mid 20's and $250,000 in debt. Gripped by a gambling addiction. How do you recover?

    💌 Join 9,500+ others in our newsletter community - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/

    From the outside, it looked like Luke Bateman was living the dream: a professional NRL career with ludicrous pay checks and sponsorship deals.

    On the inside, Luke was battling a crippling gambling addiction, deepening depression and a widening chasm between the character he was playing, and his true authentic self.

    With immense courage, honesty and vulnerability, Luke takes Hugh, Ryan and Josh through the ups and downs of his recovery journey. Luke unpicks the difference between unconditional love and conditional help from his parents, and why his time in rehab was the best thing that ever happened to him.

    Luke speaks about how his journey with addiction impacted his relationship with his mum, and the gratitude he feels for her now, and how learning about internal family systems changed his life forever.

    Luke, you are such a beautiful person. Thank you for joining us today.

    This episode discusses gambling addiction and suicidal ideation. Please take care when listening.

    This episode is part of the BE HOPE Podcast Takeover, bringing podcasts around the world together to explore the themes of hope and how we can continue to make progress in a rapidly changing world - https://globalgoals.org/behope/

    🚨If you, or someone you know is struggling with a gambling addiction

    🩵To hear our chat with Luke about The Manosphere and to join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects

    0:00 – Trailer: $250K of Gambling Debt
    1:26 – Be Hope Podcast Takeover Announcement
    4:15 – Luke Bateman doesn’t fit in a box
    6:06 – Growing up ‘soft’ in Rural Queensland
    10:03 – Hiding Books from the Boys
    17:11 – The Shame of Reading
    19:22 – Chasing a Dream to Fill the Void
    22:26 – Money, Drugs & Alcohol in Professional Sport
    27:40 – Lies, Debt & Betting Company ‘VIP’ Treatment
    30:26 – Should Gambling Sponsorship Be Banned?
    31:11 – Rock Bottom
    33:18 – The Phone Call That Saved His Life
    39:45 – Rehab, Recovery + Relinquishing Control
    43:40 – Inside Rehab “Get a Real Addiction”
    47:21 – Recovery Is Not Linear
    50:21 – Internal Family Systems: Healing the exiled child
    56:05 – Generational Masculinity: Why Men Struggle to Connect
    58:19 – Denial + Corporate Greed
    1:03:13 – Luke’s Honesty Policy
    1:06:08 – Unconditional Love vs Conditional Help
    1:10:18 – Sharing Shame with Teammates
    1:11:37 – Luke’s Message to Anyone Struggling Right Now
    1:13:03 – Finding Your Way Back

    🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode

    📚Things to read

    🎧Things to listen to

    📱Things to check out

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

  8. Dr Emily - The Phenomenon That Is Imposter Syndrome

    1 h 10 minSeason 8 · Episode 35

    Do you live in fear of being found out as a fraud? That despite your years of competency, achievement and high performance someone will uncover the truth?Well, you’re in the right place. Our resident …

    Show notes

    Do you live in fear of being found out as a fraud? That despite your years of competency, achievement and high performance someone will uncover the truth?

    Well, you’re in the right place. Our resident psychologist Dr Emily Musgrove is here to tell you that your imposter syndrome is nothing to be afraid of. In fact, it’s not even a syndrome.

    💌 Get practical take-aways from this episode, and join 9,400+ others in our newsletter community - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/

    To get a little bit meta, Dr Emily explains that knowing that you don’t know everything, is a good thing. Especially if you’re starting a new role, or trying something for the first time.

    HOWEVER, the long-term consequences of the imposter cycle such as perfectionism, overcompensation, burnout, or even avoidance and procrastination, may impact your willingness to say yes to new opportunities, such as going for that promotion or asking for support.

    In this episode, Dr Emily asks Hugh, Ryan and Josh to think about the balance of their competence and confidence, and provides them (and you!) with four practical strategies for combatting this pesky phenomenon.

    And then, a weird amount of chat about Vlad the Impaler.

    0:00 – An Emisode!
    2:41 – Adam Grant is not an imposter
    5:11 – Origins of Imposter Syndrome
    6:45 – ‘Syndrome’ is the wrong word
    8:19 – It all comes back to belonging
    10:39 – How common is imposter syndrome?
    12:20 – Fear of being found out as a fraud
    15:16 – The evolutionary psychology of belonging and self-doubt
    16:35 – Is self-doubt actually healthy?
    17:42 – Is your confidence a mask?
    18:57 – The Dunning-Kruger Effect
    23:15 – The more you know ….
    25:12 – Competence vs confidence
    26:29 – The Imposter Cycle: anxiety, perfectionism, luck
    32:09 – Becoming your own favourite artist
    35:55 – Avoidance, procrastination + self-fulfilling prophecies
    38:29 – Long term consequences ft. Hugh’s anus
    45:26 – Authenticity as the antidote
    46:22 – Less growth, less promotions
    48:52 – Strategy 1: write down your skills
    49:53 – Strategy 2: name your shame
    51:40 – Supporting a friend with imposter phenomenon
    52:29 – Self-doubt in a new role is a good sign
    57:12 – Strategy 3: mentor a near peer
    1:00:38 – Strategy 4: celebrate your success
    1:02:57 – Creating a good workplace culture
    1:04:06 – Belonging is good for business
    1:06:25 – Want more on belonging?

    Dr Em, thanks for joining us.

    🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode

    🎧Things to listen to

    📖Things to read

    📺 Things to watch

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  9. Andy Lee - DO NOT Listen To This Episode!

    1 h 9 minSeason 8 · Episode 34

    When he was 15, Andy Lee’s mum forgot who he was.💌 Join 9,400+ others in our newsletter community - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/Given only two weeks to live, Andy tells Hugh, Ryan …

    Show notes

    When he was 15, Andy Lee’s mum forgot who he was.

    💌 Join 9,400+ others in our newsletter community - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/

    Given only two weeks to live, Andy tells Hugh, Ryan and Josh how this news impacted his family, impacted his childhood, and continues to impact his sense of self.

    And then, we’re going all the way back to the early days of Radio Karate, and Hamish & Andy.

    In a long overdue conversation (recorded, of course), Ryan and Andy chat about their own friendship dynamic and why they both felt like the odd one out.

    Getting down to business, Andy and Ryan discuss how a bunch of 20 year old guys made tough financial decisions while trying to remain mates, how they learnt to give constructive criticism to each other, and with the blessing of hindsight, how they feel about that time now.

    Andy, we’ve been waiting for this episode longer than a baker with his oven off.

    0:00 – 2 years of secret vocal coaching
    4:35 – HOW long for one cartoon episode?
    5:48 – When Andy met Hamish (and Ryan)
    9:39 – The impact of getting cancelled after 5 episodes
    10:08 – The best advice Andy received
    14:07 – Jealousy, Jealousy
    20:25 – The Four Way Split of Hamish & Andy
    23:42 – Should we be recording this?
    25:10 – Social media has replaced the paparazzo
    26:11 – Andy’s nude photo scandal
    30:23 – Inspiration and renegotiation
    36:55 – The Vulnerabilitea House
    38:02 – When your mum is given two weeks to live
    40:30 – Rapid deterioration and rush to hospital
    43:28 – Taking on the parent role at 15
    46:04 – Furious at the new normal
    49:09 – Why “Don’t Worry, It’ll Be Fine” is the worst thing to say
    54:36 – Andy’s Dad’s incredible sacrifice
    58:20 – The Lee Gazette
    1:00:50 – Why we should talk about will’s

    🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode

    📺 Things to watch

    🎧Things to listen to

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  10. Philippa Northeast - My Brilliant Career Took Years of Rejection

    1 h 16 minSeason 8 · Episode 33

    Have you ever watched the person you love most get everything you ever wanted? Did you harden around envy, or shrink with comparison? Were you able to find happiness for their success?Philippa Northeast, Logie …

    Show notes

    Have you ever watched the person you love most get everything you ever wanted? Did you harden around envy, or shrink with comparison? Were you able to find happiness for their success?

    Philippa Northeast, Logie nominated and lead of Netflix’s My Brilliant Career, is a star quickly rising. Her most significant role? The little sister of our producer, Bridge.

    💌Join 9,400+ others in our newsletter community - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy

    Joining us as a guest host, Producer Bridge, alongside Hugh, Josh and Ryan, discuss the years of failure and rejection behind the scenes of Pip’s overnight success.

    Constantly aware of the need to prove herself a success, Philippa is completely vulnerable about the obsession that came from certain rejections, and her anxiety which manifested itself as trichotillomania.

    Offering a unique and intimate perspective, both Bridge and Josh reflect on their respective siblings’ success, and how that has shaped their own identity.

    It’s sibling vs sibling, and only one will make it out alive (kidding, it has a happy ending).

    0:00 – Meet Producer Bridge’s Little Sister
    5:43 – Pip’s Brilliant Career: From Home & Away to Netflix Star
    11:39 – Middle Child Syndrome
    19:28 – Sibling Comparison: Cricket and Drama Solos
    20:55 – Finding Success Straight Out of High School
    22:56 – Self-belief vs Self-doubt: Why Pip Took The Leap and Bridget Didn’t
    25:30 – Feeling Over-shadowed, and Under Pressure
    28:00 – Becoming an Unemployed Clown
    29:17 – The Sensational Potter Backup Plan
    34:01 – Getting Undressed (Again)
    35:46 – The Hollywood Grind
    37:32 – Lockdown, Isolation and Growing Doubt
    46:15 – Obsession born from Rejection
    51:49 – What Loneliness in the Acting Industry Feels Like
    52:46 – The Body Keeps Score: Trichotillomania
    54:47 – Healing: Journalling, Yoga, Grounding
    57:04 – The Hallmark Offer That Changed Everything
    1:03:39 – The Downside of Growing Up Next To A Rising Star
    1:07:29 – Choosing Pride Over Jealousy
    1:09:49 – The Upside of Losing to Claudia Karvan

    🫖 Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode

    📺 Things to watch

    🎧 Things to listen to

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  11. Matt D'Avella Tried No-Sleep-Parenting For 10 Months

    1 h 9 minSeason 8 · Episode 32

    What impact does sleep deprivation really have on your wellbeing? What about your parenting? What about your identity?Matt D’Avella has amassed over 4 millions subscribers on YouTube undertaking 30-day wellness …

    Show notes

    What impact does sleep deprivation really have on your wellbeing? What about your parenting? What about your identity?

    Matt D’Avella has amassed over 4 millions subscribers on YouTube undertaking 30-day wellness challenges, and promoting his minimalist lifestyle.

    In life that was meticulously controlled, having kids changed everything.

    💌Join 9,400+ others in our newsletter community - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy

    Blessed with a baby who woke every 30 minutes for the first ten months of their life, Matt chats to Hugh, Ryan and Josh about how becoming a new parent impacted every facet of his life.

    Hugh and Josh share just how lonely they have felt at different times during their parenting journey, and Ryan saves the day by holding a baby for a full 40 minutes (save the applause! please!)

    Matt this was a dream come true.

    To watch the full episode on YouTube - https://youtu.be/foilZTRGXco

    00:00 - I Tried Being Vulnerable for 30 Days
    7:03 - Minimalism Maxxing
    18:00 - The Vulnerabilitea House
    20:25 - Becoming a father, losing sleep (and himself)
    24:14 - Depression Diagnosis Wake-Up Call
    32:56 - Hugh's Sleep Score
    40:38 - SOS: Hiring Help, Expanding your Village
    48:50 - Sleep Training: What Actually Works
    52:02 - The Real Cost of Sleep Deprivation
    58:29 - Being A Mum: The Additional Burden
    1:01:32 - 'Do You Regret Having Kids?'
    1:04:00 - The New and Improved Matt D'Ad-Avella

    🫖Other Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode

    📺 Things to watch

    💤 Things to sleep train

    📚Things to read

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  12. How Childhood Cancer Motivated Josh Niland: One of the World’s Greatest Chefs

    1 h 6 minSeason 8 · Episode 30

    How does having cancer as a child impact the way you live as an adult?Uber successful chef and restauranteur Josh Niland doesn’t do things in halves (no, literally, have you read his book The Whole Fish?).From …

    Show notes

    How does having cancer as a child impact the way you live as an adult?

    Uber successful chef and restauranteur Josh Niland doesn’t do things in halves (no, literally, have you read his book The Whole Fish?).

    From opening a restaurant at 26, to becoming the first Australian to win the James Beard Book of the Year award when he was just 30, Josh’s creativity came from a place of desperation to explore every opportunity presented to him.

    💌Join 9,400+ people getting a Dr Emily values worksheet and takeaways from this week’s episode in our newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy

    Diagnosed with cancer 2 days after his 8th birthday, Josh’s childhood transformed in a matter of hours into hospital hallways, chemotherapy and facing his own mortality.

    In this episode, Josh joins us in the Vulnerabilitea House to talk us through an experience which profoundly changed him, which he is now grateful for.

    Hugh, Ryan and Josh (our Josh), also ask about where his drive and ambitious creativity comes from, and just how close to failure Josh’s culinary career came.

    We wish this chat could have gone on longer,

    If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link -

    🫖Other Imperfect’s episodes mentioned on this episode

    📺 Things to watch

    📚Things to read

    🍽️ Places to eat

    💻Things to check out

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  13. Dr Emily - Tough Love vs Shame

    1 h 19 minSeason 8 · Episode 30

    Is tough love to blame for our shame?💌Join 9,200+ people getting a Dr Emily values worksheet and takeaways from this week’s episode in our newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDyWe all know that parent or coach on …

    Show notes

    Is tough love to blame for our shame?

    💌Join 9,200+ people getting a Dr Emily values worksheet and takeaways from this week’s episode in our newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy

    We all know that parent or coach on the sideline who takes under 10’s basketball a liiitttllleee too seriously. And occasionally, tough love might seem to work in the moment, long term, the shame train isn’t going anywhere good.

    Dr Emily, our resident psychologist, is here to name the shame to tame it, and teach us how we can be shame strippers too (get your head out of the gutter. Shame on you).

    We go into the difference between shame, humiliation, guilt and embarrassment, bow down to the queen Brene Brown, and introduce ourselves to our own Healthy Adult.

    Shamelessly, this is one of our best episodes to date.

    0:00 – Ever heard of a shame stripper?
    6:27 – Bow down to Brene Brown
    12:25 – The other self-conscious emotions (they’re shy)
    20:51 – Humour and humiliation
    29:21 – Shame is a full body experience
    36:16 – Beware of who you share (with)
    40:43 – Manosphere + behaviour change
    46:59 – Tough love + kids sport
    57:07 – Working with shame
    1:06:10 – Bring on the compassion!
    1:10:07 – Introducing the Healthy Adult

    If you’d like to watch the full episode on YouTube, follow this link -

    🫖 Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode

    🎧 Things to listen to

    📚Things to read

    📖Things to do

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  14. The Nature of Being Alone

    1 h 4 minSeason 8 · Episode 29

    Can nature help us to feel less alone?💌Join 9,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/ …

    Show notes

    Can nature help us to feel less alone?

    💌Join 9,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/ 

    Psychologist on the incredible, Alone Australia series (remember our seminal episode with Gina Chick?), Mark Mathieson is in the Academy of Imperfection to help us understand how nature regulates our body, and how we can reconnect to it in this digital age.

    Mark talks about how to uncover the person behind the persona, the science behind gardening, and why Hugh had the best sleep of his life in a tent, with no pillow.

    According to Mark, human are immensely capable of change, and this episode provides a few things we can do to ensure nature is incorporated into our routines, without cramming the schedule more.

    Mark, it was great to be alone . . . with you.

    If you’d like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CIMSSRJg2vQ 

    0:00 – Ice breaker: where have we gone wrong?
    6:58 – The segmentation of exercise
    11:46 – Evolution of Mark
    18:53 – Person behind the persona
    24:10 – Our virtual reality future
    27:22 – Let’s learn to adapt
    36:00 – Building relationships with nature
    42:28 – The science of gardening and sunshine
    48:53 – Eventually, reality TV gets us all
    53:08 – Big city blues

    🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode

    📚Things to read

    📺 Things to watch

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - theimperfects.com.au/shop

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - patreon.com/theimperfects

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts http://apple.co/theimperfects

    All views expressed in this podcast are Mark Mathieson’s and not representative of the Department of Defence, Australia.

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  15. Briggs - What Racism Feels Like (feat. Nazeem Hussain)

    1 h 20 minSeason 8 · Episode 28

    What is racism, really?💌Join 9,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/ Adam Briggs …

    Show notes

    What is racism, really?

    💌Join 9,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/ 

    Adam Briggs, rapper, writer, actor, senator and Yorta-Yorta man, joins Hugh, Josh and guest host Nazeem Hussain, to have an honest conversation about racism in Australia.

    We explore the impact of The Voice Referendum vote, how culture and community impacts identity, and why Briggs has never, ever felt the need to people please (yep, that’s the sound of us frantically scribbling down notes).

    Briggs also chats about the highs and lows of bipolar II.

    0:00 – No boundaries Briggs
    5:26 –Big Shep’ Washing Machine
    12:25 – This is racism
    21:27 – A hyper-vigilante
    28:06 – Perfect storm for art
    36:09 – Copping it Australia Wide
    43:22 – The Yes Vote
    53:08 – Australian Culture
    57:02 – Never just about music
    1:04:50 – Make Aboriginal Cool
    1:09:19 – Bipolar, therapy, training

    🫖 Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode

    🎧Things to listen to

    📺Things to watch

    📚Things to read

    💻Things to check out

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link -  https://www.patreon.com/c/TheImperfects 

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcast http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  16. Sex for Normal People with Ita O'Brien

    1 h 2 minSeason 8 · Episode 27

    Sex is sometimes a taboo topic. Not today! Intimacy expert Ita O’Brien tells us all about the new normal in the bedroom, and how she’s introduced it to Hollywood.💌Join 9,000+ people getting our takeaways and …

    Show notes

    Sex is sometimes a taboo topic. Not today! Intimacy expert Ita O’Brien tells us all about the new normal in the bedroom, and how she’s introduced it to Hollywood.

    💌Join 9,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy

    In 2017, Ita O’Brien changed how Hollywood approached sex scenes when she pioneered intimacy co-ordination on the hit Netflix show, Sex Education, by introducing the framework, “Intimacy On Set Guidelines”. She went on to on productions for Netflix, BBC, HBO, Hulu, Amazon, including Sex Education and Normal People, founding her own company Intimacy on Set.

    And now she’s here.

    Ita chats with the guys about what sex scenes were like before Intimacy Co-ordination, and all the lies movies taught us about sex. She explains the mysterious orgasm gap, why consent is the foundation of all intimacy, and maybe most importantly of all… the male and female anatomy of arousal! That bit’s at the 16min mark if you’re really in a hurry. 😉

    00:00 – Meet Ita O'Brien, the World's First Intimacy Coordinator
    01:32 – Inside Her Work on Normal People, I May Destroy You & Sex Education
    04:17 – What Intimacy Actually Means (It's Not Just Sex)
    07:34 – The Untold Story of the First-Ever Intimacy Coordinator Job
    09:35 – What Sex Scenes Were Like Before Consent Guidelines Existed
    12:27 – Why On-Screen Intimacy Shapes How We See Ourselves
    14:33 – The Hidden Lie Movies Taught Us About Sex
    16:00 – The Male Anatomy of Arousal, Explained
    18:33 – The Female Anatomy of Arousal, Explained
    23:17 – Why Desire Fades in Long-Term Relationships
    25:59 – The Power of Touch (and Why We're Losing It)
    30:39 – How Screens Are Rewiring Kids' Ability to Connect
    34:08 – The Truth About the Orgasm Gap
    40:30 – Why Consent Is the Foundation of All Intimacy
    43:10 – Filming the Iconic Birth Scene in We Live in Time
    49:52 – How to Talk to Kids About Consent and Bodies
    52:24 – "Consent Is Sexy": A Call to Writers and Filmmakers
    54:33 – Sex, Menopause and Intimacy at Every Life Stage

    📖Things to read

    Intimacy: A Field Guide to Finding Connection and Feeling Your Deep Desires by Ita O’Brien - https://www.penguin.com.au/books/intimacy-9781529954043

    📺 Things to watch

    Sex Education (Netflix) - https://www.netflix.com/title/80197526
    Normal People (BBC/Hulu) - https://www.hulu.com/series/normal-people
    I May Destroy You (BBC/HBO) - https://www.hbo.com/i-may-destroy-you
    Catastrophe - https://www.amazon.com/Catastrophe-Season-1/dp/B00YGB8UYK
    We Live in Time (Film4/A24) - https://www.a24films.com/films/we-live-in-time

    🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode

    Esther Perel — Let's Be Better Lovers - https://open.spotify.com/episode/1BantQso5Ef3xPn4PWNG2I

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcast http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  17. Our Phone Odyssey Begins

    1 h 13 minSeason 8 · Episode 25

    Could you live without your phone for a month?🩵To hear more episodes like this, join A Little More Imperfects!Patreon - www.patreon.com/theimperfects Apple - http://apple.co/theimperfectsThis week it's just the …

    Show notes

    Could you live without your phone for a month?

    🩵To hear more episodes like this, join A Little More Imperfects!
    Patreon - www.patreon.com/theimperfects 
    Apple - http://apple.co/theimperfects

    This week it's just the three of us. And like Odysseus before us, we embark on a life changing epic.

    Where he fought the trojans, monsters, cannibals, sirens, the oceans, a cyclops and ACTUAL GODS!!

    We will do something even ‘EPIC…ER’.

    We’re tackling our phones.

    Each of us take on a month-long challenge to fix our worst phone habits, inspired by the ‘god of no phones’ - Christopher Nolan and the release of THE ODYSSEY (if that wasn’t obvious already, but we promise this episode isn't an ad).

    We then share some of our favourite bits from behind the pay wall, from our Patreon/Subscriber community. Ryan has an unplanned, very generous on-air hair donation; Josh shares a bit from a book which changed his life a bit; which leads to one of the most honest conversations he and Hugh have ever had on (or off) the show, about comparison, self-esteem, and growing up idolising your older brother.

    This is one epic journey.

    00:00 — The Phone Odyssey Begins
    08:54 — Our Phone-Free Pledges
    19:11 — Modelling Better Habits at Home
    25:29 — Hairing is Caring
    37:57 — A Bit From a Book That Changed Josh’s Life a Bit
    48:18 — The Conversation Between Brothers That Needed to Be Had

    🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode

    📖 Things to read

    📺Things to watch

    💌Join 8,300+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/sign-up-to-our-newsletter/ 

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/shop/ 

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/shop/ 

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  18. Dr Emily - You, Me & Jealousy

    1 h 5 minSeason 8 · Episode 25

    To be jealous is to be human. It is what you do with that feeling that counts.💌Join 8,300+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter …

    Show notes

    To be jealous is to be human. It is what you do with that feeling that counts.

    💌Join 8,300+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy

    Our resident psychologist Dr Emily Musgrove is in the studio to talk about THAT podcast moment: the one where Ryan admitted he was jealous of Hugh and Hamish Blake’s relationship. The one that lives in Imperfects history.

    According to Dr Em, we develop the emotion of jealousy at just 9 months old, and it shows up everywhere; family, work, school, friends.

    Feelings around jealousy can be extremely painful, especially if it is accompanied by shame.

    In this episode, Dr Emily explores why jealousy can be so dangerous when not listened to, and why our jealous behaviour can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

    See you on the other side.

    If you want to watch this full video on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/dlufNQ7iXCc

    00:00 - The Day Has Arrived
    02:48 - When Ryan Revealed He Was Jealous of Hugh & Hamish
    7:45 - Shame Tells You Not To Speak It
    10:02 - Harry Styles Walks Into a Super Market
    15:54 - You’re Making My Dog Jealous
    22:31 - Feeling Jealous vs Being Jealous
    43:49 - Hugh, Ryan & Hamish: 4 Years Later
    47:50 - How To Have The Conversation (And Build Trust)
    59:32 - You Can Feel Jealous AND Still Trust

    🫖 Episodes mentioned in this episode

    💻Things to check out

    🎵Songs to listen to

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects

  19. Joe Brumm & Hamish Blake - A Bluey-print For Dads

    1 h 30 minSeason 8 · Episode 24

    Want can you learn from playing with a child?In today's Academy of Imperfection, Bluey creator Joe Brumm joins us (for real life), with Hamish Blake stepping in as guest host.💌Join 8,300+ people getting our …

    Show notes

    Want can you learn from playing with a child?

    In today's Academy of Imperfection, Bluey creator Joe Brumm joins us (for real life), with Hamish Blake stepping in as guest host.

    💌Join 8,300+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy

    In this episode we dig into the world of play - ”the voluntary overcoming of unnecessary obstacles”, we find out what makes a ‘good’ player and why kids' imaginative play tends to fade around age 12.

    Josh and Hugh take the chance to wax lyrical about their favourite Bluey episodes, Rain, Fruit Bat, Born Yesterday, The Decider (to name a few). And all three dads also share some moments of parenting shame as we discuss the constant battle for attention between our phones, and our kids.

    00:00 - Hamish Blake from Rove
    08:13 - Bluey, The Most Streamed TV Show of All Time
    11:51 - The Best Definition of Play You've Ever Heard
    21:00 - It’s All Improvising
    38:02 - Permission to Pretend Again
    51:20 - My Kids Wouldn’t Have The Dad They Have Without Bluey
    54:00 - Doing Something Just for Fun Is a Valid Reason
    58:07 - Being Present In a World of Distractions
    01:22:00 - The Bluey Episode That Made a Room Full of Footballers Cry
    01:27:16 - Let Them Lead and See What Happens

    If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/eMigxjhCkcs 

    🫖 Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode

    📺 Things to watch

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcast http://apple.co/theimperfects

  20. Janelle Booker & Hamish Blake - The ADHD Playbook for Parents

    1 h 43 minSeason 8 · Episode 23

    How do you raise a child whose brain works differently?This episode is for parents of kids with ADHD. And parents who have ADHD. And people who don’t have a diagnosis, but would consider themselves ‘fast and …

    Show notes

    How do you raise a child whose brain works differently?

    This episode is for parents of kids with ADHD. And parents who have ADHD. And people who don’t have a diagnosis, but would consider themselves ‘fast and loose’. And for everyone who knows someone who fits the above criteria.

    💌Join 8,300+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy

    Janelle Booker, a psychologist who specialises in ADHD, is BACK, this time, to talk to parents of ADHD kids, and how to parent when you yourself have ADHD.

    And also, ADHD-curious Hamish Blake is here too.

    We look at the role of dopamine, energy vs stressors, and how to make your mornings less chaotic and more compassionate.

    Hamish and Janelle. What a duo.

    0:00 – A dynamic duo: Hamish and Janelle
    5:58 – The penny drop moment for Hugh
    11:35 – ADHD or Fast and Loose?
    19:56 – The beauty and beast of ADHD brains
    22:38 – The life of an ADHD kid
    27:16 – A crash course on dopamine
    37:26 – Structure, sleep and school
    44:38 – Identity and diagnosis
    55:13 – ADHD kids and friendships
    1:02:50 – Parenting WITH ADHD
    1:16:29 – Finding and supporting regulation
    1:23:13 – Slo-pamine
    1:28:54 – Let’s talk about the strengths
    1:34:35 – Get ‘em outside!

    If you’d like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/WwEBTIMohwg

    🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode

    💻Things to check out

    📖Things to read

    • ADHD: A Delightful Human Difference. Reframing ADHD for Good, by Janelle Booker and Matthew Johnson - https://bit.ly/4w7scU3

    🎧Things to listen to

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects

  21. Jimmy Wales (Wikipedia) - In Trust We Trust

    1 h 1 minSeason 8 · Episode 22

    How do you choose who to trust? And how do you show others that you are trustworthy?💌Join 8,100+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter …

    Show notes

    How do you choose who to trust? And how do you show others that you are trustworthy?

    💌Join 8,100+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy

    In this Academy of Imperfection, we are joined by Jimmy Wales, co-founder of Wikipedia. No biggie (BIG biggie).

    And if there’s one thing Jimmy knows, it's how to garner and imbue the trust of millions.

    You’re right in feeling like the general level of trust globally is low right now, but this episode is here to step through Jimmy's 7 rules which will help you build, rebuild, and solidify what is in our innate human behaviour.

    Trust is important, and so is this conversation.

    0:00 – BIG deal on the internet
    8:41 – The heart behind it all
    14:57 – Trust is always personal
    20:22 – It’s human nature
    23:33 – Good guys of the internet
    30:35 – Don’t take sides
    38:23 – The circle of trust
    40:15 – Own up
    46:03 – Let’s call them a civil person

    If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/Z1SPClxSfYI

    📖 Things to read

    🎧Things to listen to

    🏆Competitions to enter

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects

  22. Dr Emily - You're Full of Grit

    1 h 15 minSeason 8 · Episode 21

    Do you think you have grit?💌Join 8,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDyResearch has shown that the most common …

    Show notes

    Do you think you have grit?

    💌Join 8,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy

    Research has shown that the most common characteristic of elite performers and high achievers is grit.

    Understood as the passion and perseverance for very long term goals, Grit is not about natural ability or talent, but rather how we choose to grow.

    Your favourite resident psychologist, Dr Emily Musgrove, is back in the studio this week to talk about how you can become a grittier person!

    We also look inward, as Josh asks how to maintain grit when it feels like your inner critic is overwhelmingly loud.

    Dr Em, so great to have you back.

    0:00 – Down with the nonchalance!
    5:43 – Talent vs Excellence
    10:40 – Interested in finding your interests
    16:42 – For the non-naturals in the room
    24:22 – Effort is essential for excellence
    32:17 – Practicing, kindly
    35:01 – Hope is earned
    42:06 – The good and bad criticism
    53:45 – Encountering pain and discomfort
    59:54 – For the greater good
    1:06:09 – The dark side of perseverance

    If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, click here - https://youtu.be/JmcLV7DGL4k 

    🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode

    📚Things to read

    📺Things to watch

    ⭐️Things to donate to

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  23. Ellyse Perry - It Starts With Trying

    1 h 15 minSeason 8 · Episode 20

    At just 16, Ellyse Perry was the youngest person to ever debut for the Australian International Cricket team. 13 days later, Ellyse debuted for the Matildas.💌Join 7,800+ people getting our takeaways and …

    Show notes

    At just 16, Ellyse Perry was the youngest person to ever debut for the Australian International Cricket team. 13 days later, Ellyse debuted for the Matildas.

    💌Join 7,800+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy

    Arguably one of the greatest athletes of our time, Hugh, Ryan and Josh chat to Ellyse about how she stays so grounded amidst her incredible success, and whether she is able to separate who she is from what she does.

    Ellyse chats to the guys about her relationship with her dad (Josh and Hugh furiously take notes), and how both her parents were able to instil a love of trying rather than winning.

    And then we get onto social anxiety; what it feels like for Ellyse, why she loves silent retreats, and how she manages it in front of her fans.

    Ellyse, you are a literal ray of sunshine. Please come back anytime.

    If you’d like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/xAZeLzcG43Y 

    0:00 – Is THAT AI?
    5:05 – Running (and bowling) it’s natural course
    11:24 – The feeling of not trying
    17:18 – Parents: Be A Good Sport
    29:22 – Prepare to be disappointed
    40:23 – Bitter sweet World Cup
    46:48 – The complexity of ego
    1:03:54 – Practicing presence
    1:10:30 – Hugh’s advice for big moments

    🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode

    📖 Things to read

    📺Things to watch

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  24. We're Doing a One-Off Live Show!

    10 minSeason 8 · Episode 19Bonus

    We have a BIG announcement. August 19. Balwyn Cinema. Our first ever live podcast recording. With Hugh, Ryan, Josh, Dr Emily, and you? ARE YOU AS EXCITED AS WE ARE?! And you could win your way there! THE …

    Show notes

    We have a BIG announcement.

    August 19. Balwyn Cinema. Our first ever live podcast recording. With Hugh, Ryan, Josh, Dr Emily, and you?

    ARE YOU AS EXCITED AS WE ARE?!

    And you could win your way there! THE ULTIMATE GOLD CLASS DOUBLE PASS includes: 2 x tickets, flights or a limo if you're already in Melbourne, accomodation for the night, popcorn, choc top, sparkling wine and a personal escort to your seats by former Balwyn Cinema employee Hugh van Cuylenburg!

    🏆 Enter here NOW - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/balwyn-entry/

    Tickets will go live Monday June 8.

    🎟️ Buy here - https://bit.ly/4ecYtTw

    BUT to enter the competition OR buy tickets, you need a codeword (lowercase). And the only way you will hear the codeword is to be a Little More Imperfects subscriber and listen to the latest episode!

    So quick, subscribe here!

    🩵Patreon - patreon.com/theimperfects

    🩷Apple Podcast - http://apple.co/theimperfects

    We can’t wait to see you there x

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

  25. Ryan Holiday - A Stoic Life & Death

    1 h 13 minSeason 8 · Episode 18

    We can’t control what happens to us, but we can control how we respond. At least, that’s what the Stoic’s say.💌Join 7,500+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly …

    Show notes

    We can’t control what happens to us, but we can control how we respond. At least, that’s what the Stoic’s say.

    💌Join 7,500+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy

    Today we are joined (deep breath Hugh) by Stoic philosopher Ryan Holiday.

    Using the wisdom of the past to appreciate the present, Ryan’s work is dedicated to communicating how the practicalities of stoic philosophy can help us lead more present, mindful and resilient lives today.

    In this incredible chat, Hugh, Josh and Ryan (our Ryan), each present Ryan Holiday with something they have been struggling with in their own lives. Through the lens of Stoic philosophers Marcus Aurelius, Seneca and Epictetus, Ryan Holiday talks to how stoicism can really help us to live into our values, prioritise presence, and deal with existential dread.

    We discuss with Ryan the importance of understanding what will actually make you happy (spoiler: it’s not a billion dollars), and how to reframe death as a reminder that we must appreciate every moment (or not waste anymore with shame and guilt).

    This episode, and its practical take-aways (which you can find listed in our newsletter), has been a long time coming.

    Ryan, what an absolute honour.

    0:00 – What is Stoicism?
    13:26 – For the Josh’s of the world
    17:07 – Time and Energy of Worrying
    27:01 – The illusion of freedom
    33:50 – Am I a bad friend?
    38:58 – Practicing what you preach ft. presence
    45:42 – If today was your last day
    50:22 – 5 quotes for a Stoic life

    If you’d like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link -

    🫖 Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode

    📖 Things to read

    ✍️Journals to journal

    🎟️ Things to get tickets to

    💻Things to check out

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  26. Joel Pearson - I Think, Therefore AI

    1 h 29 minSeason 8 · Episode 17

    In the age of AI, do you feel that your future is more uncertain?💌Join 7,500+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDyIn today’s …

    Show notes

    In the age of AI, do you feel that your future is more uncertain?

    💌Join 7,500+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy

    In today’s Academy of Imperfection, we’re joined by Dr Joel Pearson; a neurofuturist, whose work centres around predicting how AI will impact every aspect of our lives from now on.

    While many of us (us included) first and foremost imagine the impacts of AI in a tech-revolution-y, robot butler-y, terminator-adjacent way, this episode goes deeper.

    Joel discusses how young people are forming attachments with AI companions and how we might see, perhaps the first generation in known history with a lower IQ than the one beforehand.

    We talk about the tangible and interconnected mental health impacts that this major societal disruption will have, and Hugh and Josh ask how in the world can we broach this topic with our kids?

    BUT, this episode isn’t all doom and gloom. Joel is a tech-optimist, after all.

    We talk to Joel about how we can foster human connection, and continue to develop our critical thinking skills, whilst not turning away from AI altogether.

    Joel, this has been invaluable.

    If you want to watch this full video on YouTube, follow this link - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPGa6heppjE 

    0:00 – The episode we’ve been putting off
    10:10 – The only certainty is disruption
    14:15 – Impact of AI on the brain
    21:23 – Rewards and moral responsibility
    27:11 – A scary mental health spiral
    30:31 – Think of the children
    35:10 – You may now kiss the AI
    45:06 – Purposeful Utopia
    58:42 – Seeing is no longer believing
    1:02:21 – The Roadmap to AI
    1:11:35 – Finding Motivation in Limbo
    1:18:15 – Let’s Stack Some Habits

    🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode

    📖 Things to read

    💻Things to check out

    📺 Things to watch

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  27. Dr Emily - What To Do With Envy

    1 h 19 minSeason 8 · Episode 16

    What is your envy telling you?💌Join 7,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDyDr Emily Musgrove, our resident psychologist, is …

    Show notes

    What is your envy telling you?

    💌Join 7,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy

    Dr Emily Musgrove, our resident psychologist, is back in the studio to talk about the green-eyed monster, and more importantly, how we can work with it to incorporate more gratitude, appreciation and awareness into our lives (hallelujah).

    Founded in the evolutionary practice of assessing our status in comparison with others, envy comes from the feeling of lacking something that someone else has.

    In what may have been an adaptive function for a cave person to secure their basic needs, our brains are not equipped for the intense comparison fed to us via social media.

    Dr Emily chats to Hugh, Ryan and Josh about the layered experience of envy, and how often, it stems from feeling not-enough or unworthy.

    Of course, Dr Emily brings the strategies. We explore how to work with envy in our own lives, and how to acknowledge it in the lives of our friends and family to protect important relationships.

    Dr Em, we’ll see you for the sequel on jealousy soon.

    To watch the full episode: https://youtu.be/B7acUnoekSc

    0:00 – Envy vs Jealousy 9:08 – Keeping up with the Jones’ 8:16 – A message around ‘enoughness’ 25:12 – The energy of being a hater 36:50 – A deep longing for a difference experience 42:13 – On the flip side 52:45 - Acknowledge the hard 59:18 – The social emotion 1:07:18 – Working with envy

    🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode

    💻Things to check out

    📺Things to watch

    📖Things to read

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  28. Reuben Williams - What Happened After My Sexual Assault

    1 h 28 minSeason 8 · Episode 15

    Can you think of a moment that turned your life into ‘before’ and ‘after’?For Reuben Williams, that moment was not his sexual assault, rather, the decision he made in the aftermath to pursue justice.💌Join …

    Show notes

    Can you think of a moment that turned your life into ‘before’ and ‘after’?

    For Reuben Williams, that moment was not his sexual assault, rather, the decision he made in the aftermath to pursue justice.

    💌Join 7,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy

    Incredibly vulnerable, Reuben talks Hugh, Ryan and Josh through what it felt like in the 24 hours after the assault, how he knew, undeniably, what happened to him was wrong, and why he chose to report it.

    We talk about the intricacies of healing, privilege, and having a world class difficult conversation with the ones you love.

    And then, Josh asks Reuben how you can best show up for your friends who might be going through something similar.

    Reuben, it was such a privilege having you in the studio.

    If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/okQnOwV2MJE 

    0:00 – An Imperfect Meet-Cute
    6:44 – The night of the assault
    19:28 – Identity, privilege, and idealism
    33:09 – Family Dynamics
    41:16 - World Class Difficult Conversation
    47:39 – The Waiting Game
    59:15 – Reuben’s Letter
    1:04:24 – A divine test
    1:10:30 – Just help
    1:18:46 – How can you be a better friend?

    🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode

    🎧Things to listen to

    💻Things to check out

    🚨If you’d like to reach out to someone for support after listening to this episode, here are some great places to start

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  29. Jan Fran - Wars For Your Attention

    1 h 11 minSeason 8 · Episode 14

    In a world so divided by hate, how can we choose to show love?This week we are joined by journalist Jan Fran, who unpacks the horror of witnessing horror.💌Join 6,500+ people getting our takeaways and favourite …

    Show notes

    In a world so divided by hate, how can we choose to show love?

    This week we are joined by journalist Jan Fran, who unpacks the horror of witnessing horror.

    💌Join 6,500+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy

    Talking through her unravelling relationship with social media and the utter helplessness she feels watching atrocities cut into 30 second clips, Jan explores how becoming a mother cracked her open in ways she didn’t know possible.

    Joining us in the Vulnerabilitea House to answer every question in the deck (kidding), Jan and Josh discuss the guilt of turning away, and the consequences of leaning in.

    And finally, Jan bonds with the Hugh, Ryan and Josh about the fundamental importance of deliberately creating community.

    Jan, you are remarkable.

    0:00 – Introducing Josh’s housemate
    8:42 – The art of being vulnerable
    17:19 – I wish I could stop going on social media.
    27:13 – Being cracked open
    35:32 – Deliberately building community
    46:39 – Anticipating the Comments
    53:34 – Optimist by will

    If you’d like to watch this full video on YouTube (and see Josh’s Frant banner), follow this link - https://youtu.be/BRoyNdZEZD0 

    🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode

    💻Things to check out

    🎧 Things to listen to

    📱Things to help you set social media boundaries

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

  30. Dr Edna Lekgabe - New Baby… New Brain… Matrescence.

    1 h 35 minSeason 8 · Episode 13

    According to perinatal and reproductive psychiatrist Dr Edna Lekgabe, matrescence is the motherhood equivalent of adolescence. Puberty 2.0, if you will.💌Join 6,500+ people getting our takeaways and favourite …

    Show notes

    According to perinatal and reproductive psychiatrist Dr Edna Lekgabe, matrescence is the motherhood equivalent of adolescence. Puberty 2.0, if you will.

    💌Join 6,500+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy

    Joining us in the academy of imperfection, Dr Edna explores the cataclysmic identity shift women undergo during motherhood, and how partners can best support them.

    Exploring the impacts of mastrescence with Hugh, Ryan and Josh, Dr Edna breaks down the difference between matrescence, anxiety and depression, and why mental illness is the number one pregnancy complication.

    We’re talking hormonal changes, physiological changes, sociological changes that are SO significant, you can see them in brain scans. Matrescence is messy, a developmental earthquake, and it’s not talked about nearly enough.

    This episode might just break the internet (and your heart) wide open.

    0:00 – Introducing Hugh’s perinatal psychiatrist
    7:30 – Matrescence? Huh?
    21:14 – The biology of baby brain
    34:10 – The difference between matrescence and depression
    40:46 – Reasonable worry vs anxiety disorder
    47:40 – The emergence of neurodivergence
    54:04 – Post-natal depression
    1:00:04 – Matrescence after loss
    1:05:50 – Getting to know a brand new person
    1:11:19 – Can women have it all?
    1:18:32 – On a societal scale
     1:26:12 – The paternal earthquake

    If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link -

    🫖 Other Imperfect’s episodes mentioned in this episode

    📖 Things to read

    🎧Things to listen to

    📺 Things to watch

    💻Things to check out

    🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz

    🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW

    🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu

    🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects

    The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.

These are the latest 40 of 309 episodes. You’ll find older episodes in the podcast’s feed.

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